Abel to Yzerman
Sunday Funnies
by IwoCPO on 07/25/10 at 12:08 PM ET
Comments (115)
Despite the fact that the Tigers’ season swirled finally and undeniably down the frigging Forsberg yesterday when Magglio Ordonez snapped his ankle? I found something that will make you happy. Happy like firetrucks and puppies and hookers in Spring? That kind of happy? No. But warm and satisfied, at least.
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Just When You Thought Dater Couldn’t Get Any Dumber
by IwoCPO on 07/23/10 at 09:10 PM ET
Comments (52)
W.T.F. Off the California coast in late July and it’s frigging cold. Somebody (Rummy, Calquake?) sold me a bad bill of frigging goods with this one. A minor irritation compared to the fact that I just can’t seem to muster a Wing-related thought that doesn’t center around Willa, which is disturbing. So, we turn to trusty Google and see where it takes me. A simple news search for The Best Franchise In Hockey usually produces immediate gratification.
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While Lou Is Losing His Mind, Stevie Is Hitting His Stride
by VooX on 07/20/10 at 10:30 PM ET
Comments (63)
When I read the Chief’s post today I was going to write a similar post to this one to break up the Chopper Willa talk around here, but I was too busy during the day to write it up. Just about an hour ago the story got a whole lot more interesting… sometimes patience is a virtue.
NHL deems Kovy contract “a retirement contract”. Says it “artificially drops cap hit”. Also states its too overloaded the first 10 yrs
More from the mainpage via TSN:
The NHL has rejected Ilya Kovalchuk’s 17-year, $102 million contract with the New Jersey Devils on the grounds that it circumvents the NHL’s salary cap.
Kovalchuk was slated to earn $95 million over the first 10 years of the deal and then just $7 million over the last seven seasons. That would translate to an annual cap hit of $6 million per year.
You can almost see the veins on Lou Lamoriello’s massive scalp throbbing from here.
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Note To Willa: STFU And Stay Home
by IwoCPO on 07/20/10 at 10:51 AM ET
Comments (49)
Willa is our adopted name for the waffling bitch that Mike Modano has become. Seriously. This is just an absolute joke. You’re 40, dude. You’ve been let go by a crap team and you could have joined the league’s best franchise. You said this on 7 July…
“The sooner the better,” Modano said of his decision. “I know they would love to get an answer so they can get their cap and their roster situated. I don’t want to delay this.”
...and this yesterday.
Modano told the Free Press he’ll make a decision, “when I start skating again—see how that feels.”
Modano said he plans to hit the ice Aug. 5 and that he won’t make a decision before that time.
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Hey, At Least He’s Got The Manilow Repertoire Down Pat
by IwoCPO on 07/19/10 at 01:46 PM ET
Comments (22)
Just woke up. Looks like Kovalchuk’s headed to LA.
Klessel
My key source in this situation believes it’s 80-20 Kovalchuk agrees to sign with the Kings by noon tomorrow west coast time.
Woops. I guess 80 percent doesn’t carry the same weight it used to. Man, you just can’t find quality info like that for free on the internet anymore, you know?
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Let The Hate Flow Through You, Bitches, It Will Make You Powerful
by VooX on 07/18/10 at 04:50 PM ET
Comments (61)
I’ve only been back in the country for a short while. Since then I’ve been catching up on hockey news as my post-Wings elimination, losing Stevie, losing Probert, depression has started to subside.
What started out as an enjoyable read through posts/comments at A2Y and the other Wings’ blogs, has slowly turned to anger. Why? Because all you bitches are obsessed with a 40 year-old dude with big teeth and a skank wife.
It’s not that I don’t understand your obsession, after all Chopper Willa was a great player. Tick-Tock and Uncle Mike also think he will be a good fit for the team. Typically that is enough to be gospel for me. Seriously. If it were up to me, all of Tick-Tock Holland’s quotes would be in red like a certain “good” book does it.
I think much free-agent obsession has to do with the reality of a salary-capped NHL. Since the salary cap was introduced, hockey GMs’ hands have been handcuffed like Rosby to Li’l Gary Bettman’s bedpost. There have been very few exciting player trades or acquisitions in the past several years. Wings fans are used to Christmas coming thrice a year: Dec 25, July 1, and Trade Deadline. Back then, we’d see more action than Happy Hudler has been getting in Europe from all those happy hookers. Not anymore.
It’s not Wings fans’ fault we have been obsessed with Chopper Willa, as the FNG McCosky is trying to assert, it is the overall lack of excitement at the time of year which used to be a spectacle of player movements. If the FNG really understood us, he’d know that prior to the salary-cap Chopper Willa would be little more than an asterisk in our consciousness. We’d have much bigger deals to discuss and debate.
Still, our latest obsession with Chopper Willa reminds me of our last free-agency obsessions: Marian Hossa and Mats Sundin. While touted to be the Mats-iah for our team, we were much better off without Sundin, as history has shown. And as the salary-cap debacle in Chicago has proven, we really couldn’t afford to keep Hossa and not destroy the future of our team.
So enough is enough, bitches. I am sick of talking about free-agents and obsessing over them. In Tick-Tock we trust, all others pay cash. Summer obsessions should be about all the sexy girls in sundresses walking around and not free-agents.
Taking the idea from a recent HFBoards thread, I’ve decided to shift the focus around here from Chopper Willa to those who really fill our hockey souls with pure hatred and loathing.
Who are your top 10 all-time most hated hockey players?
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It’s The Money. No It’s Not. Yes It is.
by IwoCPO on 07/17/10 at 10:40 PM ET
Comments (18)
I’m going to tread lightly with this one, because it’s going to reek of hypocrisy. So, tactfully...here goes.
Chris McCosky? You’re changing your mind like a chick. It’s kinda weird.
13 July/Detroit News
It’s about the money. It’s always about the money.
If the money were right, Mike Modano would’ve already signed a one-year deal with the Red Wings. The money, obviously, isn’t right, but the money isn’t going to change, either.
17 July/Detroit News
Just because he hasn’t yet accepted the $1.25 million offer doesn’t mean he feels slighted or he’s holding out for more.
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Haze Gray
by IwoCPO on 07/16/10 at 06:15 PM ET
Comments (30)
By now you’ve seen Uncle Mike’s comments regarding The Diva (Mike Modano). It would appear he’s headed to Hockeytown afterall. That’s nice, but I don’t feel like talking about that very much anymore. This will be my last post on that subject until he signs or drags his candy ass out here to the West Coast.
If he wears red, we’ll be fine. If he doesn’t, we’ll be just as fine. Babcock says a bunch of stuff emphasizing his belief that Willa’s husband will be here before long, and he talks about how awesome the Wings will be even if Willa says no.
But this was the quote that jumped out at me…
Rosen/NHL.com
“We want him to be thrilled to be a Red Wing. We are big believers in that,” Babcock said.
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Take The Money And Run Away Mike
by IwoCPO on 07/13/10 at 01:04 AM ET
Comments (95)
You’re 40. You’ve been tossed aside by a mediocre team losing money by the buttload. You’ve got, maybe, one year left and a few options to consider. The Detroit Red Wings come calling and offer you a million bucks along with a damn good shot at a Cup. You say all the right things and the wheels start to turn. You run your mouth a few times, talk about legacy and the importance of one more run.
But when it all comes down to it…
It’s about the money. It’s always about the money.
That’s McCosky and he’s probably hit the mark.
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Note To Khan(!): Your Captaincy Is In Jeopardy
by IwoCPO on 07/11/10 at 01:18 AM ET
Comments (55)
While I was galavanting across our nation and avoiding any reminders that the Wings allegedly lost a playoff series, A2Y staffers from Delta Community College outside Saginaw were assigned the task of tracking our Diggers the past few months. Their findings boiled down to this: Chris McCosky is finding his voice as not only a Wing beat writer, but...sit down...a guy who’s not afraid to share an actual opinion.
Here’s an example from two days ago.
On another note, god bless Brett Lebda. The Toronto Maple Leafs, who apparently did not have access to any Red Wings game footage from last season, signed Lebda for two years at $1.45 million per. Unbelievable.
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About Abel to Yzerman
Welcome to Abel to Yzerman, a Red Wing blog since 1977. No other site on the internet has better-researched, fact-laden and better prepared discussions than A2Y. Re-phrase: we do little research, find facts and stats highly overrated and claim little to no preparation. There are 19 readers of A2Y. No more, no less. All of them, except maybe one, are juvenile in nature. Reminding them of that in the comment section will only encourage them to prove that. Your suggestions and critiques are welcome:
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Most Recent Blog Posts
Just When You Thought Dater Couldn’t Get Any Dumber
While Lou Is Losing His Mind, Stevie Is Hitting His Stride
Note To Willa: STFU And Stay Home
Hey, At Least He’s Got The Manilow Repertoire Down Pat
Let The Hate Flow Through You, Bitches, It Will Make You Powerful
It’s The Money. No It’s Not. Yes It is.
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