Little Gary is nailing this one. I mean he’s drilling it. Drilling down and drilling deep as only Mini-Stern can.
I wasn’t at the presser today, but here’s the one I held in my noggin.
Will there be a Winter Classic Gary? “Yes.”
Where? “Chicago.”
Really? Soldier’s Field? That bitch holds at least 80K. “No. Wrigley, like the gum. It harkens back to Bob Redford just crushing the bejesus out of the ball, right through the clock. Right after Glenn Close stood up, sunlight flowing through her gown. Majestic.”
Wrigley Field holds half of Soldier’s Field you little troll idiot bastard. Why? “We’re opening the nation’s eyes to Blackhawk hockey. I’m trembling.”
Tickets. They’re on sale we assume. Where? The Hawk website, the Wings’? Stubhub? Ebay? Mirtle? “You make me giggle. Like a schoolgirl, I’m giggling. We haven’t decided how, when, where, if we’re going to sell tickets to this Classic, this second Classic, played in the Winter, near the United Center (I think) so that my daddy David can watch with his feet up in his sky box with his harem. Don’t you see? No tickets yet.”
But Gary. Don’t the fans have a right to know where they can get tickets, how much they’ll cost, how many will be available? “I prefer to let newly appointed director of league communications, Drew Sharp, answer that question for me. Drew?”
“I really don’t care what fans or bloggers think.”
Got it.
Is it just me? Is it? Am I the only one who sees this for the idiocy that it is? Check this out, from Slap Shots’ review of the Winter Classic II press conference.
If you were a member of the media, you would have gotten a press release in your email inbox shortly after noon with lots of quotes and this final line at the very bottom: “Ticket information and other NHL Winter Classic 2009 details will be released at a later date.”
Or you can go here to see the transcript as provided by the epic George Malik.
One last question from me.
Gary? How are you still employed? “OMG. I have no idea. None.”
100k > 40k
Thanks Gary. Ass.
Posted by Clark on 07/22 at 04:12 PM