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Stress Train Tickets Officially On Sale Today

Chris Osgood’s starting the All Star game.  Just as I predicted he would way back in September.  Ok, no I didn’t.  But I did predict Mike Babcock would open his mouth to the media yesterday and end up sounding like a Latin teacher on crack.

St. James

“I’m pretty sure it’s my call,” Babcock said. “And I’m not leaning—I know.”

I’m leaning toward something else and here’s what I know:  Sundin, Hossa, Fors-flopping-berg?  If they were off the table a month ago, they’re on it today. 

‘Cuz, you know…Hank’s back’s a-hurtin’ and the stress train is at the station, two months early.

Here’s what we know:  the back thing isn’t going away.  Maybe ever.  Consider him out of the All Star Game, if that matters to you or the other 2 percent of the nation who are going to watch it.  That’s got to be a done deal, or a fait accompli as they’d say in Denver.  After that?  I say sit him until…March? Mid February?  It really doesn’t matter because anything can set that hummer off.  First I’d heard of this…

St. James

He missed five games in late December after aggravating his back while picking up his laundry bag.

My point? Sure, go ahead and sit him and he won’t aggravate it playing hockey.  But, while you’re at it, immobilize him completely.  Put one of Hasek’s straight jackets on him, put him in John Travolta’s plastic bubble (oh…look out.  You don’t remember the “Boy In the Plastic Bubble”? Classic).  Seal him up until the playoffs.  No movement whatsoever. 

My second point?  It makes no difference whether he plays or not because he could hurt it again, or worse, doing anything.  Yes, Emma…anything. 

Oh, but if he plays?  Yeah.  That would be a target right underneath “Zetterberg.”  As Chris so astutely put it in the comment section here yesterday….eff me.

So what to do? What to do?  I say sit him now and sit him often. Every back to back.  The ELEVEN STRAIGHT GAMES against the Central Little Gary’s given us to close the season might be a nifty time to rest too.  Real quick:  what an amazing way to get Detroit pumped for the postseason.  Spend the entire final month of the regular season playing teams we’re almost guaranteed not to see in the playoffs. By the time the first round starts lawn jarts will have officially supplanted hockey in Detroit.  Thanks Gary…ass.

Back to Z.  Thankfully, Aristotle has a few words of wisdom as to what the organ-I-zation believes is the right course of action.


St. James…again

“That’s not my business. I mean, it is my business, but he knows his body better than I know it.”

I don’t really have to tell you who said that do I?

If Detroit had intended to spend a little dough at the deadline on a deal for a dman…those plans might be out the window.  There’s not a forward out there who can replace what Zetterberg brings to the table, and Hank’s probably going to be healthy for the playoffs (thanks to your pal and mine Mr. Cortisone), but you have to know Kenny and Jimmy and Mikey and Stevie and Mikey are all looking around at a few guys they may not have seriously considered a few weeks ago.

So that’s, you know, kind of a sucky way to start your All Star Week. 

Even if your starter’s Chris Osgood.

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Comments

     

Avatar

Eh, sit him until the stretch at the end of the year, even if he is ready long before that. That streak against the Central would be a nice way to warm back up for him going into the playoffs. He’ll only have to play 10 or 15 minutes and can make use of the time getting his timing and legs back. It’ll be like an extended scrimmage against the JV team.

Posted by Nathan on 01/22/08 at 08:34 AM ET

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Hank has a frail back.  Get used to it.
I assume the training staff are doing everything they can, with massages, manipulations, stretching exercizes, ultrasound, etc.
Hank should be regularly rested.  Maybe play every-other game like Hasek.  It is obvious now that his back cannot take the grind of an 82 game season.  So give him a 60 game season, and rest him regularly.  That way you prevent him from injuring his back, and avoid the prolonged abscence from the lineup.

Posted by w2j2 on 01/22/08 at 08:35 AM ET

PDXWing's avatar

I have the strongest feeling that the Wings will make a trade for Michael Ryder, especially if there are going to be concerns about offensive depth.  Not to replace Z of course, but as a supplement to depth, which doesn’t rule out a dman rental (at the deadline the Wings, with 5 mil is space, can take on approx. 15 mil in face salary value).  You heard it here first.

Posted by PDXWing on 01/22/08 at 11:39 AM ET

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For this season, yes, rest him a lot.

Long term, let’s not give up just yet. I mean, don’t be naive and think he’ll be fine, but let’s not panic and treat him like 93-year-old Hasek. The trainer he worked with to strengthen his core to stop the groin injuries did wonders. I say give him another offseason with a back specialist.

Once that’s done, we’ll know that no stone has been unturned, and then we can revert to babying him (and rightfully so).

Posted by Nathan on 01/22/08 at 11:41 AM ET

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There MUST be an All-Star game curse.

Heatley separated shoulder - 6 weeks.

Crosby sprained ankle - 6 to 8 weeks.

And now it is moving west.

(Lidstrom doesn’t worry me, though - his multiple exposures have built up his immunity to the contagion.)

Posted by Baroque from Michigan on 01/22/08 at 01:02 PM ET

hockeychic's avatar

Time to ride the stress train again?  I just recovered from the last ride.  (sighs and climbs aboard)


I think Baroque is on to something with the All-Star Game curse.  Maybe they should just cancel the whole thing.  Not that anyone would notice…

Posted by hockeychic from Denver, CO on 01/22/08 at 01:09 PM ET

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question:  does this effect Hank’s long-term contract?  can we get him for a little less?  bring up the fact that he can only seem to play 60 games a season?  curious to see what people think.

Posted by Alex on 01/22/08 at 01:12 PM ET

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If it doesn’t it should, Alex.  IMO it’s got to shorten the term, maybe to as few as three years, which would essentially lock Z up till he’s 31.

Posted by HockeyinHD on 01/22/08 at 02:14 PM ET

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If he plays 65 or 70 games this season, continues producing, and has a good playoff, I don’t know how much it will impact negotiations. I would guess that the cap hit will not change, it just might change the structure of where money is paid throughout the deal, and like HD said, how long the term is.

Posted by Nathan on 01/22/08 at 03:16 PM ET

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James Mirtle has never seen so many replacements before - so it isn’t just our limited perceptions.

I vote for cancelling it.  Give everyone a few days off to vacation with family and get prepared for the last portion of the season, and vote for some kind of All-Star honors (no game, just honors) at the end of the year or something.  The only game that really resembles an actual game is baseball, anyway, and Selig messed that up trying to make it “relevant.”

Posted by Baroque from Michigan on 01/22/08 at 04:36 PM ET

Osrt's avatar

From George at Snapshots:

The NHL has chosen to replace Zetterberg and Paul Stastny, who is out after having his appendix removed, with Ducks forward Corey Perry and Stars forward Mike Ribeiro. Disappointingly, Sergei Zubov was replaced by Ducks defenceman Scott Niedermayer, not Brian Rafalski. That makes four Ducks—Perry, Ryan Getzlaf, Chris Pronger, and Niedermayer—and 3 Red Wings (Datsyuk, Lidstrom, Osgood). Seems fishy to me…

Posted by Osrt on 01/22/08 at 05:37 PM ET

Matt Saler's avatar

Ah, Baroque, but then they’d miss out on partnerships such as the one announced today:

The National Hockey League (NHL) has partnered with actress Alyssa Milano and G-III Apparel Group (NASD-GIII) to begin offering an NHL version of the TOUCH – by Alyssa Milano clothing line.
                                                               
        TOUCH – by Alyssa Milano is a unique women’s fashion apparel line designed for the female fan. The high-end brand blends fashion and function and will become an addition to the NHL’s current women apparel offering in early February.

I kid you not. That’s from an actual press release on the NHL Media site, though I haven’t seen it anywhere else.

Why would the NHL want to give that up?

Posted by Matt Saler from Grand Rapids, MI on 01/22/08 at 06:08 PM ET

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Ahhh, the Stress Train!  All shiny and ready to go.  Could have left this one in the barn for another few weeks. 

Chief, maybe you could add a fashion show to the trip courtesy of ... TOUCH – by Alyssa Milano clothing line. Entertainment of sorts.  First the new uniforms and now this…

Waiter!

Posted by Rumbear from Sandy Eggo on 01/22/08 at 06:23 PM ET

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@Matt:

Oh.

My.

God.

Kill me now.

I bet it’s #&$*ing pink.

(Then again, this is coming from a woman who has nearly always worked in a lab environment so I can go through a work week without even looking at a suit.  And I HATE trying to shop for clothes.  It’s like there are only two real women’s labels: “Grandma’s Closet” and “T.J. Hookerwear” and I’m neither a dowdy grandmother or a prostitute.  Options for real people are somewhat limited.)

Posted by Baroque from Michigan on 01/22/08 at 07:40 PM ET

cementslinger's avatar

Chief, I know I mentioned last week or so, that I wouldn’t hop on that train quite yet… well, now I’ll be taking my seat.

I’ll be more than happy to jump off when Hossa, Kovalchuk and/or Prospal get a nametag in the Wings dressing room.

Posted by cementslinger from Midland MI on 01/22/08 at 08:23 PM ET

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Wow..This Should turn out to be quite a deal..!

Posted by nasd compliance on 07/14/08 at 10:41 AM ET

     

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