Bubba’s in town today and he’s feeling frisky. Winning, competing, shutting out BJs, eyes on a first round matchup that would only lead to community pain in Nashville.  Hasek’s starting, says he feels nifty. Mac’s sitting, but re-assumes role of team spokesman.  No matter the circumstances, this phrase is not pleasant: “shot in the groin.” More on that, and I’m sure you’re happy. Gordie’s almost 80 and the celebration’s slated for the Joe today.

Dominik Hasek doesn’t want you to worry about him.  Nothing to see here, feeling good.  But Dom...the flu, the hip, the groin, the back, the age, the insanity.  No way you can be fully healthy. No way.

Khan(!)

“I’m feeling great,’’ Hasek said. “I feel like I am back in shape.’’

Oh. Ok. 

Khan(!) astutely points out Hasek has played 7 of the Wings’ last 21 games.  He also mentions that Dom himself has always said a heavy workload of games and practice prepares him better than any amount of rest could.  So, three out of the next four games should do the trick. I’m sure he’ll be ready.  Positive, in fact, just as long as he doesn’t miss any of this:

“From now on, I cannot miss any practice, any game, except for one back-to-back (Wednesday-Thursday), which I do not expect to play (both games),’’ Hasek said. “I have to be ready for every practice, every game, that’s the only way I can get into the best shape when the playoffs start.’’

I get it.  What the Miracle said above, about feeling like he’s “back in shape” and “feeling great.” That’s kinda, you know, conditional.  Somebody tell me one frigging reason I should be looking forward to the playoffs.  Is there anything at all enjoyable about this experience? 

Here’s a Homer update for you.  Somebody stuck a sharp needle in his groin.  Dude...dude.  And that made him feel better.  Of course it did. He got the shot, right in the groin, on Friday.  Skated a little, stressed a lot. 

I guess Khan(!) threw a hypothetical at him, something like...what if you took a sharp needle to the groin and the pain comes back?

“I don’t want to go there. This (shot) is going to work.’’

I hear ya Homer.  Everyone looking forward to wondering if every shift he plays is his last this season?  That’s the definition of fun right there.  Waiting to see if Homer’s coming out on the power play.  Waiting to see if he’s at the morning skate, if he’s in the lineup for Game 3.  Ouch, a Pronger knee to the nuts.  Woops, Roloson’s stick right...there.  Wow, look at that...a Foote butt end.  Ahhh, nevermind.  I refuse to worry about any of that.  Really.

Ok. Here’s the deal.  Vancouver, Edmonton, the Dive, Bubba, Calgary, even Dallas.  Any one could be the Wings first-rounder starting 12 April (that’s the date we heard earlier this week, but stand by because the DDC said this morning we start on the 10th. Could have been a typo. Imagine that).  Of those six, I’d take Dallas first, Bubba second.  No, Bubba first.  Yes, that’s it.

I’m assuming you agree.  I’m assuming you realize, as I do, that Nashville presents the easiest road to first round happiness.  So...you’re feeling a little conflicted today, eh? 

Nah. 

Headline in the Tennessean this morning: “Win Could Help Wings Avoid Preds In Playoffs”. 

“I’m pretty sure they don’t want to play us (in the playoffs), so they probably think this is a big game for them, too. They want to knock us out.’’

That’s your boy JP Dumont.  Actually, JP, I’m betting the Wings really want to see you. More specifically, they’d kinda like to get to know Dan Ellis a little better.  Let’s recap this one more time:  Kipper, Luongo...or Ellis. 

It really doesn’t matter to me that he’s shut out Columbus two games in a row (although he did turn away 43 the last one on Friday).  We’d like to see young Dan, if it’s all the same to you JP. 

No potential opening opponent matches up with Detroit in any area but goaltending.  And, assuming Jose Three or Four (who’s was that? Hockey Chic?  Brilliant) continues to play well, every team but Nashville holds a legitimate edge in the crease.  Jesus, I feel dirty.  No, even if 3/4 stays luke warm, Hasek’s still a better option.  But, still...I’d rather see Bubba in round 1 than the Dive. 

Anti-Digger

“Tomorrow’s game could have playoff implications with first-round matchups,” Red Wings forward Darren McCarty said. “Nashville’s fighting for their lives. We’re going to go out there and play hard. We want to go into the playoffs on a high note and doing the right things.”

Weird, eh? A quote from Darren McCarty talking about getting ready for the playoffs with the Wings.  Speaking of Mac, he’s sitting today.  So’s Samuelsson and of course so is Homer.  Downey’s in and I’m assuming so is Hartigan.  Hartigan.  Hart-i-gan.  Harti-gan.  Harrrrr-tigan.  Yep. Just did a little test.  Any way I type it I still get pissed off.  Answer me this:  if Babcock’s trying to figure out if McCarty’s able to add something to the playoff mix, why is he out today and Hartigan in?  Whatever.  As Gramps would say, and does often, I’m not a gm and I’m certainly no coach.

Three teams have 86 points: Edmonton, Vancouver, Bubba.  The Oil, though, have played 80 while the other two: 78.  Tough hill.  Vancouver is floundering to say the least.  They have four left: Calgary twice, Dive and Edmonton...all at home.  Bubba: us today, then two with the Bitter Blues and one with Chicago.  If Bubba wins three of four, I think they’re in.  No way Bobby and the ‘Nucks win out.  Edmonton? If they win their final two, they’re still shafted if Bubba wins 3. 

Got it?

As for the Wings?  Dilemma time for Uncle Mike as he decides who to rest and when.  Magic number is three for the President’s Trophy.  So Detroit needs two more points, and San Jose needs to give up one point some time in the next four.  Easy solution for Detroit: win today.  San Jose: Phoenix, LA, LA, Dallas.  Wings: Bubba, Chicago, BJ, Chicago.

Freep

“But the reason you want to win is so you have home ice,” said Babcock. “And saying that, our focus is getting our game ready—has been all year long and continues to be, so we don’t tend to change our focus.” Wings defenseman Chris Chelios said a quick Presidents’ clinch and early rest would be ideal for the Wings’ workhorses.

“Some guys obviously could benefit. The earlier the better,” Chelios said. “Guys like Pav and Hank and Nick and Raffi, those guys that have been logging a lot of ice time, it would be a good rest for them. Get them playing 12, 14 minutes as opposed to the 20, 25 they’re playing now.”

Clinch home ice. Rest everybody any chance you can.  We downplay the President’s Trophy now, but remember losing it later.  When? Like the first round when San Jose plows through Bubba in four and we’re sweating out a six gamer with Calgary.

Gordie turns 80 Monday.  I’ve got a signed copy of “9” sitting next to me that I haven’t cracked open yet.  Not sure why.  It’s on a shelf next to a Howe-signed puck that I really don’t know what I’m going to do with.  I’m not a big memorabilia guy.  Maybe I’m waiting for my daughters to get older and explain to them who he was, show them the book and the puck and try to tell them about his place in hockey and Red Wing history.  There’s a good chance I won’t be able to do him justice. 

George Johnson/Calgary Sun

Rogers Sportsnet analyst John Garrett tended goal for the Whalers during those final competitive seasons of Howe’s 32-year career.

“Even at 50 or 51, you didn’t want to piss Gordie off,” says Garrett. “One night, I remember, Robbie Ftorek gave it to Mark (Howe) with his stick. Really bad.

“Next time we play them, two weeks later, they’re lining up to take a faceoff. Gordie, of course, just happens to be right beside Ftorek. Before they can even drop the puck, he wheels around and pitchforks Ftorek in the face.

“After the game, Don Blackburn, who was our coach—or maybe it was Harry (Neale)—says ‘Holy crap, Gordie, what was that all about?!’ “And Gordie says, ‘Didn’t you see the way he hit Mark two weeks ago?!’

Happy 80th Mr. Hockey.