LOGIN | REGISTER | RSS FEEDS

Abel to Yzerman

WoooHooo…The Blues Are In Town. Sing For The Laughter.

by IwoCPO on 12/09/09 at 02:10 PM ET
Comments (0)

You woke up smiling this morning at just the mere prospect of it.  There are no guarantees, not this year.  But the possibility that thousands of Bitter Bitch Brittle Blues fans will sob themselves to sleep tonite after a loss to the evil Wings is enough to keep all of us warm all day.  Over at Game Time, where the moaning reaches a deafening roar by, well, game time…they’ve devoted 4 posts to the Wings.  Just today.  Awesome.

All games are exciting, but games against the Red Wings carry that little something extra. That something? Pure, unfiltered hate. I won’t be wearing anything red tomorrow.

No red on game days.  Crazy.

Oh yes…we know.

Faux Detroit.  Noted.

And if you’re an apologist, feeling offended that we’ve elected to pick on the garbage Blues fans today?  Suck it.  Suck it now. Suck it tonite during the game, at both intermissions, and then afterward after the Wings win?  Go ahead and suck it a few more times. 

Oh god I know.  That was “mean”.  The Dive bloggers have more ammunition that I’m a “hater”.  I blog with “hate and venom”. Got it. 
Steven Tyler had a message for me this morning. Something about giving equal attention to both fools and sages.  You might believe we’ve had our fill of the former so far this post, but you’d be wrong.  Blues fans aren’t fools, necessarily. They’re just cursed and not shy when the choice comes to stay quiet or whine like a bitch. 

Fools?  You want some? 

Here’s three.  Me, Forklift and CT on the Hockeenight podcast.  90 minutes is a long time and I found out Monday night I can say a lot of really stupid stuff over the course of an hour and a half.  I stand by my statement that a certain “captain” is on Tiger’s list of 9 though.

Another?  Try anyone who is claiming Jimmah Howard is the Wings’ number 1 guy.  That’s just dumb.

I didn’t post anything yesterday, obviously, but I did read a bit.  And a few articles I saw were leaning toward annointing Jimmah as The One.

Now.  Is Howard playing well? Yes.  Even better than expected.  Better than Osgood?  Yep.  But the only way he sees a minute of playoff time is if Ozzie’s hurt.  A couple reasons for that: we’re gonna have a battle on our hands with every line on every shift no matter who the Wings play.  Uncle Mike’s gonna go with who he knows. Is Osgood frustrating him? Yes.  But when April rolls around there’s only one choice and we all know it.  As with all our other “goalie controversies” started here the last three years? They’re fun to talk about from November to March.  After that they mysteriously disappear.

Sages?  Plenty of those as well.

The Srappy Octopus reminded me how Ville Leino practically demanded top line minutes last summer, and has proceeded to absolutely blow nearly every game since.  She also reminded me what it’s like to write with an ironic twist.  That’s kinda deep and elitist sounding.  What I meant to say is that she pretends she gets all hot for the Finnish kid but we know she’s lying because some chicks are just like that.

Her ode to Leino

You’re such a non-conformist, and you know that people like me always want precisely what appears unattainable and elusive. Oh, and don’t even get me started about the way you shoot off into the netherworld: It tells me that I’d never, ever have to worry about emergency contraception or even regular birth control if we got it popping.

Wonder if Uncle Mike’s got an ode.  Because if he did, the one to Ville would not be kindly.  In fact it would be downright stern.

“Looking up to the press box is something I love to do
specially when I know the bearded bitch up there is you.

We brought you here from Europe and for that you give us this
A candy ass who skates through mud and smells of Dachsund piss.

I like to sit you Ville, and I love to laugh with Brad
That’s McCrimmon, not Brad Lebda, but both have made me sad

But not as sad as you young man
That I guarantee

Because I’m gonna keep benching your ass
Til you learn that ice time isn’t free

Pay the price bitch and maybe I get you back in there.”

That’s Uncle Mike’s ode to Ville Leino, who’s sitting again tonite.  Back in the Babcock Doghouse where we predicted he’d spend most of the year because he just doesn’t seem like Mike’s type of guy.

Live Blog tonite and I feel like some Van Halen.  Pick your tune if you’d like.

Filed in: | Abel to Yzerman | Permalink
 

Comments

Be the first to comment.

Add a Comment

Please limit embedded image or media size to 575 pixels wide.

Add your own avatar by joining Kukla's Korner, or logging in and uploading one in your member control panel.

Captchas bug you? Join KK or log in and you won't have to bother.

Most Recent Blog Posts

About Abel to Yzerman

Welcome to Abel to Yzerman, a Red Wing blog since 1977.  No other site on the internet has better-researched, fact-laden and better prepared discussions than A2Y.  Re-phrase: we do little research, find facts and stats highly overrated and claim little to no preparation.  There are 19 readers of A2Y. No more, no less. All of them, except maybe one, are juvenile in nature.  Reminding them of that in the comment section will only encourage them to prove that. Your suggestions and critiques are welcome: .(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address)

Get the top online sports betting bonuses available to sports betters!