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Big Game 4.999999919 Tonite In Hockeytown
by IwoCPO on 05/27/09 at 12:24 PM ET
Comments (85)
We don’t talk too much about series clinching Game 5’s around here. So, I’ll be referring to tonite’s matchup as a Game 4.99999919. I’m sure it will make a huge difference.
That’s still like 7 hours away though. And I guess, based on some math I just did, that we could be looking at around 10 hours until I can talk about the stuttering idiot of a Pittsburgh DJ I heard last week on my way home from Hockeytown after the Wings OT winner in Game 2.
I’m smart that way, not tempting fate. I never have. I guess when I become an “elite” blogger, I’ll consider it. But not yet.
Well there was that one time a little more than a year ago? During a Game 5 live blog when I started counting down in ten second increments with about five minutes left in a Cup clinching game that turned out to be a stab to my retina with a dull stick covered in bacon grease.
And I guess, a few hours before that one Game 5, I posted a ditty that may have come back to haunt me.
But those were the only times and I’m not going to do it again.
I’m not going to talk about what a win tonite would mean, because jinxing this team is the last thing I want to do. Oh, the guilt. If I were to mention the fact that a win tonite vaults us back into our god-guaranteed place in the Final against Little Gary Daddy’s Bitch of a Baby Boy and his invisible friend Geno, and then we were to lose? I know I’d blame myself.
Yes. It would be my fault. And when Pavel Datsyuk and Nick Lidstrom spent Sunday and Monday and all the days that fall between that day and next Friday resting? Yes, that would suck and I’d feel horrible about it.
Enough with the idiot talk: Do I want Detroit to win tonite and finish off the Wing Bitch and his band of infants? Of course. But, those five days of rest that Gary guarantees us if this thing goes six looks pretty tempting right about now.
Great points from the 19 today in Okie’s game day post. Winning once without Nick and Datsyuk is one thing. Winning twice is another. And continuing to win after that is foolhardy to expect. Fortunately four words bode well for a victory tonite, even though that means a quick turnaround to begin the Finals.
And which four words are they? Thank you for asking. Joel. Quenneville. And more importantly: Cristobal. Huet.
This thing’s done tonite. Wings smell blood and the Pens are on the horizon.
5 to 12.
1 to a rematch.
1 to stick yet another semi-truck of Wing win right up Gary’s ass.
1 to force Little Gary Daddy’s marketing geniuses to come up with yet another Jackatoreum ad highlighting the league’s second best team.
1 to prove the Western Conference is so far superior to the East that the only WC playoff team that couldn’t have beaten the best they have to offer is St. Louis and that’s only because Sweet Adorable Baby Jesus doesn’t want their fans to be happy.
Finish this bitch tonite so we can get on to the business of watching another Mellon Arena crowd shuffle out in tears. Stunned.
Do it.
Filed in: | Abel to Yzerman | Permalink
Comments
“elite” blogger
BWWWAAAAAHHHHHAAAAAA… not April Fools again is it?
Posted by MOWingsfan19 on 05/27/09 at 12:33 PM ET
holy crap. you know what I just realized? against the Penguins in the SCF, we’ll finally have an opposing blog that is actually worth posting on, some great Photoshop battles, and all the associated entertaining buffoonery. with the teams we have played so far, I forgot that kind of thing even existed.
you know what else I realized? work blocks pensblog.com.
Posted by PaulinMiamiBeach on 05/27/09 at 12:35 PM ET
you know what else I realized? work blocks pensblog.com.
That’s because pensblog.com is an ad site for pens.
You’re thinking of THEpensblog.com
And for the sake of not playing hockey in July, can your team PLEASE win this game tonight?
Posted by Kstewy16 on 05/27/09 at 12:40 PM ET
“a stab to my retina with a dull stick covered in bacon grease”
hey now, don’t you sully bacon’s good name.
Posted by laerm from rochester, ny on 05/27/09 at 12:42 PM ET
That’s because pensblog.com is an ad site for pens.
You’re thinking of THEpensblog.com
haha, awesome.
Posted by PaulinMiamiBeach on 05/27/09 at 12:43 PM ET
from thepensblog.com:
Chris Osgood says he left the Red Wings game yesterday with “a touch of the flu” and that he isn’t injured.
where did they get that from?
Posted by PaulinMiamiBeach on 05/27/09 at 12:45 PM ET
The PensBlog kids are going to love the last three words of this post.
Posted by HockeyJoe from Upstate New York on 05/27/09 at 12:47 PM ET
real tough guy. at least at thepensblog they don’t try to be Billy Bad Ass.
Posted by btumpak on 05/27/09 at 12:48 PM ET
1 to stick yet another semi-truck of Wing win right up Gary’s ass.
Gary? I’d like you to meet Johny E. He’s 6’-5” you know…
Posted by mrfluffy from Long Beach on 05/27/09 at 12:51 PM ET
real tough guy. at least at thepensblog they don’t try to be Billy Bad Ass.
Posted by btumpak on 05/27/09 at 01:48 PM ET
What the f*ck are you talking about? Have you read Thepensblog? The only thing separating them from being us is that they’re unfortunate enough to be Penguins fans.
Posted by J.J. from Kansas on 05/27/09 at 12:54 PM ET
I dunno. Our battle with Pen(i)sblog was SOOOOO last season. I wouldn’t mind seeing what the best of the Able Canes blogs have to offer in trolls, photoships, and juvenile nicknames for their own players…what? Oh, that’s right. There aren’t any Hurricane blogs, because they’re in South Carolina. Oh well. Bring on Charlie and the girls!
Posted by AndrewFromAnnArbor from Fortress Europe on 05/27/09 at 12:55 PM ET
At least we’ll get to use (Hossa) and Fiesta Redwingscana against them this year.
Posted by AndrewFromAnnArbor from Fortress Europe on 05/27/09 at 01:01 PM ET
Cool, my favorite douchebag from THEpen(i)sblog made an appearance. ‘Sup stewy.
Posted by WingsFanInBeanLand from Lidstrom's head telling him 1 more year on 05/27/09 at 01:06 PM ET
There aren’t any Hurricane blogs, because they’re in South Carolina
I’m offended. Take it back.
Posted by clemshady from Greenwood, SC on 05/27/09 at 01:13 PM ET
If we were measuring in Kronwall-Games, this would be game 4.2, within a rounding error (or really, a referee error) of a sweep.
Posted by Zoogz on 05/27/09 at 01:19 PM ET
Sorry, ladies… I was out for the last week. What’d I miss?
The kinder, gentler me has recently returned from Maui—you’re all going to be referred to as “ladies” now. Enjoy it while it lasts because as soon as the SCF G1 puck is dropped (in what, like, mid-JUNE?!?), you’ll be bitches again.
Actually, I did catch the games on TV, but original6donna didn’t want me to take my laptop—so no bloggies for me.
Dan
Posted by original6dan on 05/27/09 at 01:26 PM ET
I’m offended. Take it back.
Make me bitch.
This blog’s getting chippy already. What chance does the game itself have?
Posted by AndrewFromAnnArbor from Fortress Europe on 05/27/09 at 01:30 PM ET
C’mon Chief, be nice, the Pens are better than Columbus and Calgary, too.
Posted by Nathan from the scoresheet! on 05/27/09 at 01:33 PM ET
Lets’ Go Boys! Keep your eyes on game 5..then the prize!
Did I mention that I am sick and tired of nhl.com referring to Crosby as “Sid.”
Posted by daywannawonga on 05/27/09 at 01:39 PM ET
Make me bitch.
Careful, I’ll send Bubba, Goober and Dwayne across the pond for you. No telling what kind of international incident 3 backwoods boys from SC could initiate!
Posted by clemshady from Greenwood, SC on 05/27/09 at 01:43 PM ET
.....referring to Crosby as “Sid.”
It’s Thid. The S is silent.
So, who do you think the Pens are rooting for tonight? Bit of a conundrum for them don’t you think?
Posted by Rumbear from Top O da Hasek, when in doubt, pinky out on 05/27/09 at 01:49 PM ET
Going down to the D with my brother and cousin to try and get tickets in. Should be fun haggling times.
Wish us luck bitches.
Posted by Osrt on 05/27/09 at 01:51 PM ET
Yes. We’re finishing this shit tonight.
Posted by SYF from a "Bron-Y-Aur Stomp" on 05/27/09 at 01:53 PM ET
Ah, I’m I missing something, or isn’t there one more win against Chicago before we would deal with Thid & co.?
Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 05/27/09 at 01:54 PM ET
DO IT!!!!!
GO WINGS!!!
5 to 12
Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 05/27/09 at 01:55 PM ET
Detroit secretly FEARS the Pens.
They just won’t admit it.
Posted by Jimmy from Windsor on 05/27/09 at 01:57 PM ET
On a side note, NHL.com is reporting Roy turned the Avs down:
http://www.nhl.com/ice/news.htm?id=423964
Posted by Hippy Dave from Portland by way of Detroit on 05/27/09 at 01:58 PM ET
Detroit secretly FEARS the Pens.
I fear the f*cking Islanders. I fear everybody.
Fear and paranoia is the lifeblood of this blog.
Posted by Mandingo from The Garage on 05/27/09 at 02:00 PM ET
Big story just breaking regarding Chris Chelios using banned tanning products.
Posted by Jimmy from Windsor on 05/27/09 at 02:02 PM ET
Big story just breaking regarding Chris Chelios using banned tanning products.
Posted by Jimmy from Windsor on 05/27/09 at 03:02 PM ET
Wow, you’re lame. My mommy says I can’t keep trolls as pets, but I’m hoping she makes an exception for you since you’re harmless.
Posted by J.J. from Kansas on 05/27/09 at 02:05 PM ET
On a side note, NHL.com is reporting Roy turned the Avs down:
http://www.nhl.com/ice/news.htm?id=423964
Posted by Hippy Dave from San Francisco by way of Detroit on 05/27/09 at 02:58 PM ET
It sort of backs up LaJerkwhocantmanagethesalarycap’s claim that he will be hiring from within. This was a fishing line throw and he reeled back nothing.
Posted by SYF from a "Bron-Y-Aur Stomp" on 05/27/09 at 02:05 PM ET
On a side note, NHL.com is reporting Roy turned the Avs down:
Citing “family reasons,” eh? His sons are done with hockey, from what I understand, and are moving on to bigger, gayer things. I’m guessing his wife won’t move back to Denver and he wouldn’t have any fun without his punching-bag?
Posted by original6dan on 05/27/09 at 02:05 PM ET
You guys really need to work on your comebacks for trolls. They’re so boring.
Be more creative! Be funny! Something!
I look forward to reading them but it’s getting painful!
Posted by Jimmy from Windsor on 05/27/09 at 02:11 PM ET
Detroit secretly FEARS the Pens.
They just won’t admit it.
The Pens know they are the Wings’ bitch.
Posted by daywannawonga on 05/27/09 at 02:22 PM ET
Citing “family reasons,” eh? His sons are done with hockey, from what I understand, and are moving on to bigger, gayer things. I’m guessing his wife won’t move back to Denver and he wouldn’t have any fun without his punching-bag?
Posted by original6dan on 05/27/09 at 03:05 PM ET
Well you know those tracking ankle bracelets are getting more high powered so Patrick’s kids probably can’t go across any borders.
Posted by HockeyJoe from Upstate New York on 05/27/09 at 02:35 PM ET
No telling what kind of international incident 3 backwoods boys from SC could initiate!
I’m gonna guess they’ll eat some shoofly pie, stink up the place with BO and skunky denim overalls, get off with their first cousins, and generally reinforce every negative stereotype about Americans left over on this continent from the Second World War. Said stereotypes will then be projected onto me, causing Europeans to treat me with snoot and scorn. So basically they’ll be leaving the place exactly the same as they found it. Well, bring ‘em on, I say, I’m ready for ‘em. If it’s any consolation, the French will either retreat from them in fear at first sight or else hail them as comic messiahs who will revive the great traditions of Frankish humor.
I’m pretty sure Patty Wah’s sons are moving on to Grown Men Humping, AKA Mixed Martial Arts. He’s probably looking to become their manager.
Oh, and was I the only one who wanted to make a snarky comment about the Kuklathon raising more in twenty-four hours through goodwill than Hockeybuzz could raise in a year through bogus trade rumors?
Posted by AndrewFromAnnArbor from Fortress Europe on 05/27/09 at 02:37 PM ET
I’m guessing his wife won’t move back to Denver and he wouldn’t have any fun without his punching-bag?
His wife actually divorced him about three years ago.
Posted by hockeychic from Denver, CO on 05/27/09 at 02:40 PM ET
Be more creative! Be funny! Something!
Jimmy, nobody’s bothering to pay attention to you or give their comebacks more than five seconds’ thought because it’s obvious you’re not worth the effort. Get some trolling lessons and come back later when you’re really able to get under peoples’ skin.
Although the Cheli fake tan comment showed a brief moment of inspiration—bravo.
Posted by AndrewFromAnnArbor from Fortress Europe on 05/27/09 at 02:40 PM ET
Pens in four.
Posted by Puckhead from Jersey, you dolts! on 05/27/09 at 02:50 PM ET
.
Be more creative! Be funny! Something!
Because you’re obviously the bastion of creativity.
Posted by Alan from Atlanta on 05/27/09 at 02:51 PM ET
Pens in four.
See, now THAT’S comedy.
Posted by clemshady from Greenwood, SC on 05/27/09 at 02:54 PM ET
Pens in four.
Get some trolling lessons and come back later when you’re really able to get under peoples’ skin.
Learn to say something that might be realistic enough to piss us off, Jerseytroll.
Posted by MarkK from Maryland on 05/27/09 at 02:55 PM ET
Ty Conklin hasn’t won a Stanley Cup when he is involved in an outdoor game…
Lost with Edmonton
Lost with Pittsburgh
....
Posted by Ramziabid on 05/27/09 at 03:13 PM ET
Ty Conklin hasn’t won a Stanley Cup when he is involved in an outdoor game…
Lost with Edmonton
Lost with Pittsburgh
....Posted by Ramziabid on 05/27/09 at 04:13 PM ET
Third time’s the charm.
Posted by mrfluffy from Long Beach on 05/27/09 at 03:16 PM ET
Ty Conklin hasn’t won a Stanley Cup when he is involved in an outdoor game…
Lost with Edmonton
Lost with Pittsburgh
....
bwahahahahah….yes, I’m sure the pressure of manning the stopwatch and tracking defensive shifts will be unbearable. He will certainly implode, drop the stopwatch and prove himself to be a perennial playoff underperformer.
Posted by Osrt on 05/27/09 at 03:25 PM ET
Learn to say something that might be realistic enough to piss us off, Jerseytroll.
Your mom never loved you.
Hmm??
Posted by Puckhead from Jersey, you idiots! on 05/27/09 at 03:31 PM ET
Guess not, cuz she died in childbirth, friend.
Posted by MarkK from Maryland on 05/27/09 at 03:32 PM ET
No Lids, No Pavs, No Drapes. Another test as a team. The Wings will pass with flying colors.
Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!
Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 05/27/09 at 03:34 PM ET
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I always want to come up with something inspiring and clever to say at this point, but this far down the page it’s already been said.
Posted by MarkK from Maryland on 05/27/09 at 12:31 PM ET