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Abel to Yzerman

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Have A Happy And A Healthy

by IwoCPO on 03/05/08 at 10:54 AM ET
Comments (11)

Well, well, well.  Happy learned how to putt.  My second favorite line in that movie, only behind…

..."the price is wrong bitch.”

Few things make me laugh harder than one man calling the other “bitch.” Of course, in many circles, that’s been replaced by the youthful “biotch,” which works for some, I guess.

Indiscriminate, irrelevant references to Happy Gilmore.  Nothing to do with the return of Rafalski, the imminent return of the captain and the grizzled veteran.  And, that, of course is the expected topic of conversation today.  Health. The value of it and the expectations that accompany it.  Thoughts on that, and more!...now.

Some of us are ass-uming that with the rested, rejuvenated and healthy comebacks of our blue line; that all will be well. That this losing streak, this frigging straw jammed up a nostril run of ineptitude, is going to just go away because the Swede will be back Sunday, and because Rafalski is back tonite.

Very possible.  But, unlikely, I think.  I wouldn’t be surprised to see a loss tonite, and another on Sunday.  And I can tell you that while those two events would make me sad?  Reality says that it’s going to take a few games to get back into the swing of things.  Look. I’m just trying to prepare you.  Don’t get all “defensive”. 

While we’re on the subject of reality, here’s one for you:  Denver’s not going to miss the playoffs.  There is no chance of that. 

I wrote that and then figured I’d better do a little research before I pull a Dater and end up looking like a lazy idiot.  I’ve looked at their remaining schedule and revise that previous statement to read: There’s a better than likely chance Denver will make the playoffs.  But, their schedule the rest of March is frigging brutal.

Next three: Anaheim, Dallas, Dallas.  Two easy ones with Atlanta and Edmonton, followed by another tough stretch with Jersey, Minnesota and Calgary.  Throw two more games with Edmonton in there then a final two weeks that features nothing but a diet of Flames, Canucks and Wild to close out the season.

That’s going to lead to one of two things: they’re either going to miss the playoffs altogether, or they’re going to weather that storm and be a tough team to beat in the first round, if they don’t move higher up the standings. 

Despite the bluster of MSMers/turned bloggers, either scenario should be readily accepted. If they miss the playoffs...well, you know the kind of fodder that will provide us for another calendar year.  If they make it, and end up our first-round opponent?  That’s great too, because that defense and that goaltending and that coaching...all add up to a Detroit victory.

But, but...Floppa.  Yes, I know.  And yes, I know the history and the level of his play in the playoffs generally, and against the Wings specifically.  But Forsberg isn’t enough to guarantee them the four goals per game they’d need to beat Detroit over a seven gamer.  Can he will that team to one, even two, wins? Yes.  With a healthy foot, yes he can.  But he can’t play defense, and unfortunately for Denver neither can Liles and his pals.

Legitimate question:  Why the continued focus on Denver here at A2Y? Two answers.  Because it’s March and we’re interested in who we’ll meet in the playoffs.  Oh, and also because I’m not fond of the franchise, the former Blues coach they have behind the bench, Cammie’s little bitch of a brother who stands next to him and rubs his tummy, or the “fans” who flock to the Ass Can (but not enough to fill it up on the night of Floppa’s miraculous return). 

What to do with the sixth dman?  Is it Lilja who will sacrifice himself blocking four shots per game, but could very well cost us a series through a boneheaded mistake that makes me curl, rock, suck the thumb and stay fetal for several hours?  Is it Lebda, who has so much speed but little else?  Or is it Meech?  How tempted is Uncle Mike to sit the big Swede and the Domer and let Meech open the hockey world’s eyes to just how much talent he has on hockey’s biggest stage?  Tempted, but he won’t do it.  Here’s your pairings:  Lidstrom/Rafalski.  Stuart/Kronwall.  Chelios/Lilja.

McCarty. What to do with McCarty.  Big deal in GR tonite for Mac’s final game, but...is he even playing?  I have no idea. Last I heard he was limping off the ice Monday night.

McCarty left Sunday’s game after taking a hit along the boards from Lake Erie’s Johnny Boychuk near the Griffins’ bench with about 12 minutes left in the game.

McCarty was helped to the locker room, but he returned to the ice for a couple more shifts with a few minutes remaining. He was held out of Tuesday’s practice as a precautionary move and to let him rest.

Haven’t seen anything else on that. You?

Let’s ass-ume he’s healthy.  Let’s further guess that he’s in a condition that would allow for eight to ten effective minutes per night.  Who you sitting Mike?

My guess? Kopecky.  Too much playoff experience in Drake.  Downey won’t see the ice in the playoffs unless one game gets out of hand and his presence is absolutely necessary the next, even with Mac and Drake in the lineup.  Kopecky just isn’t bringing much to the table and McCarty on the ice has too much upside to sit.  Lines I like:

Filppula-Datsyuk-Holmstrom
Franzen-Zetterberg-Cleary
Maltby-Draper-McCarty
Drake-Hudler-Samuelsson

Speaking of Cleary.  He’s skating, practicing with the team, wearing that big honker of a mask.  Projected return the last week in March? 

Not projected by me. If he’s practicing now, I say he’s in there by St. Patrick’s Day.

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Comments

McCarty will have to prove himself to Babcock before he replaces anybody in the playoffs.  If he can skate at all, I would think he and Drake would be exchangable.

Posted by w2j2 on 03/05/08 at 11:09 AM ET

I’d argue that they started getting back into the swing of things Friday night against the Sharks and that the Buffalo game was a continuation.

Tonight, they face an opponent who had a month almost as bad as they did, but without the excuse of missing five of their best players for much of it. Unless they completely lay an egg, they should be able to pull out a win, even if they don’t play “A” grade hockey.

Posted by Matt Saler from Grand Rapids, MI on 03/05/08 at 11:26 AM ET

Cammie’s little bitch of a brother

Heh… most excellent.

I thought Babcock was going to eat his brains last Dive thrashing.

Posted by TeamDub from The gratch. on 03/05/08 at 12:32 PM ET

I’m betting Colorado will miss the playoffs.
Myrtle’s updated #’s show they need to go 9-6-0.

They could sneak in the backdoor if CGY, NAS, or VAN hit a long slump. 
That would be scary…

The last team to slide in the back door (W/Conf) was
Calgary, and they went to the SCF finals. 
They would have won the SC in G#6, if not for poor Officiating.

Posted by HockeyTownTodd from upset when blogs don’t live up to my expectations on 03/05/08 at 12:43 PM ET

Kopecky has been a waste all season long.  He had some promise last year but stunk in the playoffs and this season.  I like Ellis in his place.

Posted by Tuba Guy from Royal Oak, MI on 03/05/08 at 12:59 PM ET

They could sneak in the backdoor if CGY, NAS, or VAN hit a long slump.

Calgary is pretty solid right now - they have their eyes on first in the division, and I can’t see them slumping unless they lose their offense (i.e. Iginla).

Vancouver could easily slide, though.  They can’t score worth spit.

Posted by Baroque from Michigan on 03/05/08 at 01:02 PM ET

Calgary owes Colorado, the Av’s were the reason the Flames snuck in the back door the year they went to the finals.

Posted by HockeyTownTodd from upset when blogs don’t live up to my expectations on 03/05/08 at 01:30 PM ET

I was watching the Nord/Canuck game on Center Ice last night, and the Ass Can was so quiet you could hear the refs on the ice.

Posted by JGraham on 03/05/08 at 01:37 PM ET

Out of all the teams fighting for that last spot in the playoffs, I bet Vancouver blows it.  Colorado will sneak in, Calgary may just win their division, and for some reason, no one can seem to beat Nashville (which PISSES ME OFF) besides Buffalo here lately.  I’d love to see Colorado make it as the 8 and Vancouver as the 7 and see the SoGay empty come the second week of April rather than see the Dive miss the playoffs and have to put up with Bubba any longer than I have to.

Posted by Chris from Columbia, Tn on 03/05/08 at 01:51 PM ET

Damn, that was a LOADED post.  Anyone else here lovin’ that we’ve got the Grind Line back together?  Grind line back in form, a potential clinton in the white house...this is all starting to feel very late-90’s again. 

If you need me, I’ll be watching Titanic.*

*Denotes lie

Posted by disch from austin on 03/05/08 at 05:01 PM ET

Damn Iwo, I figured “I eat pieces of s&*t like you for breakfast!!  You eat s&*t for breakfast?” was going to rank near the top of your list for that movie.  Though my favorite is the correctly accented single word “JACKASS!”

Posted by Dahrken from Grand Rapids, MI on 03/06/08 at 08:25 AM ET

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