Abel to Yzerman
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I’m Placing The Stairway To Suck Off Limits
by IwoCPO on 11/24/09 at 03:42 PM ET
Comments (118)
No more Zeppelin. It’s simply not working and, honestly, it may be an idea that has doomed the first two months of the season. I’m man enough to admit that I may have contributed to the bad things that have happened. That, et al, is no act. I’m fauxing serious.
Until further notice, I’m going back to an old standard. A Michigan man.
This post is not going to be filled with happiness. I’m just warning you. I’m feeling depressed. How depressed? Well, here’s the cereal I ate this morning.
I called Adrian Dater a biotch on Twitter this morning. Not sure what his recourse could be. Will need to consult with the A2Y Squad of Attorneys and see if I’m in danger of litigation. I can’t afford much more than a six pack of PBR if he elects to sue.
But, hell, first Oprah announces that her shove it all in, lose it, eat some more, lose that shit too, then screw it I’m fat and I dig it farewell tour has begun. And we were sad. Then her sister @adater calls it quits too? How much am I expected to take in a span of a week? Huh?
So I won’t be sticking up for the Unibomber anymore. While we’re on the subject of talk show divas and candy-ass Denver “journalists”, Todd Bertuzzi looked like a hostess on The View last night. He avoids contact at all costs. He doesn’t “engage.” Drew Miller went to the net and the very sight of it made Bertuzzi queezy. I said last night that he was playing like J. Edgar Hoover. Not because he has an astute crime-fighting mind. But because there’s a good chance he may have been wearing a broach and maybe even fishnet socks.
My comparison was idiotic and insulting. I apologize to the Hoover family. But know this: Todd Bertuzzi looked like absolute, taffy-stuffed garbage last night. I’ve been saying it since 2007. The only way this works is if he regains some of the hatred, or at the very least some passion for the game. The only time I saw a spark of energy out of him was when he was lamely arguing an offensive zone hooking call in the third fauxing period.
Uncle Mike can say all he wants about his backchecking and whatever else he’s complimented J. Edgar on but I’m starting to think the whole Bertuzzi experiment is coming to an ugly end.
Speaking of ugly…dammit, I can’t remember who said it last night but it was so very awesome. If you hate Bertuzzi you can blame the Oompa Loompa. Yep. If Happy Hudler hadn’t taken off for Russia and the land of happy spankers and pliable hookers? We wouldn’t even be talking about this. WTF Happy? W. T. F.
We’re decimated and it’s time we came to realize just how bad this is. The defection of Hossa, Happy Hooker and William Tell left us little room and we all knew it. Now the absence of Franzen, Wally and Willie has crippled the offense. Add in Kronwall, who was looking better and better…and you just feel like tasting gun oil. But hey, you shouldn’t fret. We’re not even in the top five of teams affected most by Sweet Baby Jesus and his sick obscenity of an injury joke. Ready? I knew you were.
This year there has been lots of injuries just like seasons of past, but every year a different team is affected. Below are the top five teams that have been largely affected by key injuries for this season:
#5: New York Islanders:
The Islanders are yet again at the bottom of the table amongst management and stadium problems. Will the Islanders move, it really doesn’t matter at this point because they are in last place in the Atlantic Division and not because of their talent. The Islanders have six players out with injuries, most notably their big money goaltender Rick DiPietro. That 15 year contract is looking more like a problem since DiPietro has yet to have an injury free season since signing. So, what’s more important having a healthy expensive goalie or keeping the Islanders in Long Island?
#4 Edmonton Oilers:
There isn’t much to say for the Oilers, except that they have a league high eight players injured. All are key players and all are costing the team key wins. Granted, the Oilers weren’t expected to have great season but they do look very disappointing thus far.
#3: Vancouver Canucks:
Canucks need not to worry, that broken foot of Daniel Sedin seemed to be healed. Three days ago, he seemed to be out four to six weeks but the announcement was made yesterday that he would most likely play today at Chicago. So, either the foot wasn’t that bad or Sedin is one tough twin who wants to be out there with his brother. The other key loss has to be the often injured Pavol Demitra. If he could only stay healthy he could be huge for any team.
#2 Washington Capitals / Pittsburg Penguins:
Both teams are in first place in their divisions and both are the top two in the East. However, both seem to be stacking up injuries. Washington has seven players out and Pittsburg has five and both seemed to still be playing well, but for how long? The Penguins will most likely continue to play well, despite losing Chris Kuntiz. However, Washington has looked a little sluggish without rookie Quintin Laing, Alexander Semin, and Mike Knuble.
#1 Carolina Hurricanes
If there is any team that is having a disappointing season due to injuries it’s the ‘Canes. Not only are team leaders Cam Ward and Eric Staal still out with injuries from last season but they have yet to find answers or replacements for them. They have looked dismal this year and I wouldn’t look twice if I see Toronto pass them in bottom cellar.
The long term injury of Franzen outweighs every one of them, in my opinion. But…WTF do I know? I only watch the Wings. I’m not a pharmacist. My blog’s “just an act” and I don’t know how to use “et al” in a sentence.
Thankfully, and as a result of last night’s suck fest, Uncle Mike has a plan. I’d like to show it to you.
“...we’ll almost have an eight-man block with six players,’’ Babcock said. “It’s way too complicated to explain, but it’ll be simple.’’
Interns from Grand Valley State said Ansar allegedly nodded his head like he understood a fauxing word of that. Then he explained it this way.
The top two pairs will remain the same (Nicklas Lidstrom-Jonathan Ericsson, Brian Rafalski-Brad Stuart). They’ll play against the opponent’s top two lines. Then he’ll pair one of those players with Brett Lebda and another with Derek Meech to use against the third and fourth lines. And he’ll rotate.
Somebody somewhere said something silly about Chris Osgood. It’s in the live blog and you can look it up if you want. Chris Osgood was far from the problem last night. Far. From. The. Problem bitches. He played awesome. Goaltending is not our issue. Goaltending is not going to make or break this season.
Goaltending is not why we’re fighting for a playoff spot and it’s not why the only team beneath us in the Central is the Bitter Bitch Brittle BlowmeGameTime Blues. Injuries are. And as long as the Wings keep it close until the studs come back, all will be well for all the same reasons we’ve discussed….adversity, experience, blah, blah, blah.
Unless, of course, more injuries are coming down the pike and who the hell are we to say they’re not?
Then we’re boned again and again, like a Dive fan.
Ugliness awaits. More of it. I sense it and so do you. We’ve reached a stage where we don’t even look forward to the games anymore. But it will pass.
Having said that? J. Edgar’s got to go. I’m sick of his pansy ass. Another astute comment from last night? Bertuzzi ruined two careers when he went Bundy on Moore. He’s a shell and a fraud when you compare him to what he used to be. I’m tired of defending him. Floating, avoiding, escaping, giving pucks away like candy at Christmas, letting little itty bitty hockey players push him around when he should striking fear in their rooster hearts.
Time to move on big guy. Your nuts are somewhere else, and they’ve been there for half a decade.
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All frustration over the penalty kill is completely understandable, however. That is not an over-reaction at all.
Posted by Baroque from Michigan on 11/24/09 at 08:32 PM ET
Agreed.
The awful PK is the one area we all seem to be having a unanimous opinion.
It is bad and has been for far too long. And that is not an over-reaction.
It is an embarrassment that the ogan-I-zation must address - soon - one way (coaching) or another (players).
Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 11/24/09 at 09:14 PM ET
Until further notice, I’m going back to an old standard. A Michigan man.
Iggy Pop- faux yeah.
Homer. Homer, Homer, Homer.
Tomas Holmstrom (1)
Assists: Brian Rafalski, Johan Franzen Detroit 1-0
Tomas Holmstrom (2) (Power Play)
Assists: Pavel Datsyuk, Brian Rafalski Detroit 3-2
Tomas Holmstrom (3)
Assists: Brian Rafalski, Henrik Zetterberg Buffalo 6-2
Tomas Holmstrom (4) (Power Play)
Assists: Nicklas Lidstrom, Brian Rafalski Detroit 2-1
Tomas Holmstrom (5) (Power Play)
Assists: Pavel Datsyuk, Henrik Zetterberg Game tied 1-1
Tomas Holmstrom (6)
Assists: Henrik Zetterberg, Pavel Datsyuk Vancouver 2-1
Tomas Holmstrom (7)
Assists: Pavel Datsyuk Detroit 2-1
Tomas Holmstrom (8)
Assists: Pavel Datsyuk, Todd Bertuzzi Detroit 2-0
Tomas Holmstrom (9) (Power Play)
Assists: Henrik Zetterberg, Pavel Datsyuk Detroit 1-0
Five of Holmstrom’s goals so far this year gave Detroit a one-goal lead. One tied the game, one cut the deficit to one, one bumped the lead to two, and the other was useless.
Four of his goals came on the power play.
Every goal featured Rafalski and/or Datsyuk with an assist, with a strong flavoring of The Essence of Hank. In fact, a total of only six players netted assists on his nine goals.
Datsyuk: six
Rafalski: four
Zetterberg: four
Lidstrom: one
Franzen: one
J. Edgar: one
Looking at these statistics I can say with impunity that he scores his goals primarily by tipping in shots from the point or by crashing the net looking for rebounds. He isn’t a power play specialist, he’s a goal mouth specialist. If the Wings are playing their game and he goes to the net he’s going to score.
The problem with the Datsyuk-Bertuzzi-Holmstrom line is not Holmstrom, and cannot possibly be Datsyuk. Holmstrom has a specific job he does very well, and Datsyuk is. Yeah, you read that right. Datsyuk is. The problem is Bertuzzi. End of story. Uncle Mike needs to learn to change up the lines when they’re not working. Stevie had a great comment about the feasibility of a Hull-Yzerman-Robitaille line during his induction speech: “Scotty tried that line, and he hated it”. Uncle Mike needs to hate this line just the same. Try Miller on that line for faux’s sake. It couldn’t possibly be worse.
Then there’s the Circus. We all know how likely that is.
Posted by monkey from here to Timbuktu on 11/24/09 at 09:15 PM ET
“...we’ll almost have an eight-man block with six players,’’ Babcock said. “It’s way too complicated to explain, but it’ll be simple.’’
Interns from Grand Valley State said Ansar allegedly nodded his head like he understood a fauxing word of that. Then he explained it this way.
The top two pairs will remain the same (Nicklas Lidstrom-Jonathan Ericsson, Brian Rafalski-Brad Stuart). They’ll play against the opponent’s top two lines. Then he’ll pair one of those players with Brett Lebda and another with Derek Meech to use against the third and fourth lines. And he’ll rotate.
Basically there’s there’s three grabbers, three taggers, five twig runners, and the player at whackbat. The center tagger lights a pine cone and chucks it over the basket, the whack batter tries to hit the cedar stick off the cross rock, then the twig runners dash back and forth until the pine cone burns out and the umpire calls “Hotbox”. Finally at the end you add up however many scoredowns it adds up to and divide that by nine.
Suffice it to say he fears pairing Lebda and Meech much like mere mortals fear feeding mogwai after midnight.
I feel compelled to ask what happened to Lidstrom-Ericcssccssccssccsson, Rafalski-Lebda, and Stuart-Meech, or whatever it was, I can’t tell Lebda and Meech apart? That’s not too complicated to explain.
Posted by monkey from here to Timbuktu on 11/24/09 at 09:44 PM ET
RanDumb thoughts cause I am heading to AridZona for a few days. Ammo is cheap and the targets be bountiful.
Jeebus are those the sugar coated Emos. Be careful with those little bast#*^.
A2Y Squad of Attorneys and see if I’m in danger of litigation.
Skies clear out here…Sailor. Stay the course. FYI…standard retainer needs to involve the word “Rum”.....the word Keg gets the law clerks all motivated but, we can negotiate from there. ( No lawsuits filed on Fridays because, well, Rum. Wednesday afternoons are not good either. Golf, then Rum.) Man’s gotta have rules. which segue’s into….
Led Zepp..you knew that was doomed from the start right?
But because there’s a good chance he may have been wearing a broach and maybe even fishnet socks.
Careful on them broaches…put one on Hillary and she could make D-Men run for cover. Tuzzi…..more like Adam the hermaphrodite at that award thing last night. Think figure skating…...
Like I said .....I’m off to the Desert cause there are things that need shooting and my number has been called.
Happy Turkey day to the 19 and keep the faith.
Posted by Rumbear from Top O da Hasek, sippin rum & catchin some rays on 11/24/09 at 10:10 PM ET
Basically there’s there’s three grabbers, three taggers, five twig runners, and the player at whackbat. The center tagger lights a pine cone and chucks it over the basket, the whack batter tries to hit the cedar stick off the cross rock, then the twig runners dash back and forth until the pine cone burns out and the umpire calls “Hotbox”. Finally at the end you add up however many scoredowns it adds up to and divide that by nine.
Posted by monkey from Going rouge on 11/24/09 at 09:44 PM ET
Ab-so-lute-ly hilarious.
Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 11/24/09 at 10:21 PM ET
Or possibly…just possibly…the Red Wings just aren’t that good a team.
Nah, who am I kidding? The Red Wings are garbage thus far because Todd Bertuzzi nearly killed Steve Moore five years ago, Gary Bettman hates them, bloggers don’t respect them, Adrian Dater stopped twittering, the economy is a mess, and Dennis LaRue knows the rulebook. Those are all the REAL reasons the Red Wings are sugar on a shingle. Couldn’t be because they’re aging and their “young stars” like *giggle* Ville Leino couldn’t hit water if he fell out of a boat.
Posted by Anthrax Jones from Reality on 11/24/09 at 10:33 PM ET
Well, here’s a long shot but here goes. If for some stupid reason any of the 19 are going to be in or around St. Louis this coming Saturday, I now have an extra ticket to the game that I’d be willing to part with for a price/service/draft pick to be determined later. They’re mezzanine level in the corner where the Wings will be attacking twice, so not fantastic seats, but I’d love to have another Wings fan there to help me share the gamewrecker ta…..errrr… keep up some LGRW chants.
jjfromkansas (at) gmail (dot) com.
Posted by J.J. from Kansas on 11/24/09 at 10:34 PM ET
Datsyuk is.
Nicely done Mr. Monkey. The Homer analysis is on point.
A friend of mine who knows his hockey complained that Homer is the worst player on our team *on his side of center ice* and there may be some truth to that. However, as you noted already, Homer is a goal mouth specialist and will score as long as we’re breaking out and transitioning the way we normally do.
I’m not looking it up, but how is Lidas doing? I’ve noticed a lot of uncharacteristic mistakes, but also remember that he starts seasons a bit slow.
I said earlier that we need to prepare for a lot of frustration ahead as Babbles continues to play Tuzzi in the same spot. For Datsyuk’s sake, I hope that isn’t true. And considering Miller’s late promotion last game, I wouldn’t be surprised to see Tuzzi on a short(er) leash in the next few games, especially if we play teams from our division.
Here is one thing that has been bothering me about Tuzzi: We say that only the best players get to play and consistently work on that principle. What did Tuzzi do during the preseason or practice to merit playing with one of the best players in the world as his center? If, as we have argued, the expectations aren’t that high on him, why put him in such a high position, a position he didn’t *earn* and could only be demoted from? I was behind Babbles’ attempt to reignite Tuzzi’s confidence but am now wondering if he didn’t put the guy in a position to fail.
No one has chemistry with Dats like Hank. Tuzzi is certainly not expected to rise to that level, or even Mule or Hossa’s level. But like those two, his number one job is to shoot; keep your stick on the ice and ready to fire. Homer is the net front guy and Bert’s job is to get the pucks there. His second job is to fight along the boards and get a cycle going in order to do job 1, shooting. This isn’t a complicated formula and certainly doesn’t need him to handle the puck into the zone, and especially not to dangle at the offensive blue line.
The key to Wing success over the years has been strictly defined roles. A player is assigned a particular part and given more if he plays himself up like Cleary, Mule, Stuart and Helm. So what is Bert’s job? What are its basic outlines? At this point, I would argue that Bert just needs a demotion like Stuart did when he came to the Wings. Give him a third/ fourth line spot where his primary job is to get in on the forecheck, hit and try to create some chaos in front. The point isn’t to be punitive, I don’t trust his psyche to handle that, but to simplify. Give him a simpler job and let him play his way up.
Posted by Osrt on 11/24/09 at 10:36 PM ET
Posted by Anthrax Jones from Reality on 11/24/09 at 10:33 PM ET
Sorry, jones.
Your analysis is flawed.
We don’t care what you think.
Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 11/24/09 at 10:40 PM ET
What did ____ do during the preseason or practice to merit playing with one of the best players in the world as his center?
He hasn’t broken a leg, broken a wrist, or blown out a knee. At least not yet.
That’s my working theory. Problem is that there are a few other guys who haven’t broken anything or need to recover from surgery, and one of them might be more worth a shot.
At least cheer up Pavel a little bit by letting somone else on the line do some of the hitting, anyway.
Posted by Baroque from Michigan on 11/24/09 at 10:44 PM ET
F*ck it, if Babs isn’t willing to make Pav happy by giving him a better winger, then let’s go the other way with this. Let’s make him completely snap and see how psycho Pav plays, instead of the now depressed Pav. I say someone hangs a Max Talbot poster in his locker, that oughtta do it. Then he can just skate up the ice, whenever a defender draws near, he can just give them the puck, and then run them over and take it back; repeat until near the net. By that time the goalie will be so scared, he’ll just get outta the way. There, scoring problem fixed.
Either that, or he’ll just burn down his own house (thanks for that piece last summer Tyler…)
Posted by John W. from a bubble wrap cocoon on 11/24/09 at 11:02 PM ET
He hasn’t broken a leg, broken a wrist, or blown out a knee. At least not yet.
But he’s been with Dats since the start of the season. How did that happen? That’s what I’m wondering.
At least things are exciting now :barf:
Posted by Osrt on 11/24/09 at 11:23 PM ET
...the Wings were ready to negotiate. Hudler and his agent began talking KHL before arbitration.
That’s because both Happy and the Wings knew the Wings couldn’t afford what the arbitrator was going to award. Happy didn’t want to play for anyone else in the NHL (and said so openly), so he found a way to make the money he was worth and still remain committed to the Wings in the NHL. If anything, fans should be applauding his commitment to the team instead of thinking of him as a “traitor”.
Happy will be back either next year or the year after. He’ll be a more complete player than he ever could have become on the Wings’ 3rd line. And he’ll be among the best bargains in the league.
Absolutely nothing that’s happening this year can be blamed on Happy.
Posted by OlderThanChelios from Grand Rapids on 11/24/09 at 11:36 PM ET
Posted by OlderThanChelios
Well argued sir. Agreed on all counts.
The only thing is, we’re sad that Happy had to leave and Tuzzi was the replacement.
Posted by Osrt on 11/25/09 at 12:26 AM ET
Posted by monkey from Going rouge on 11/24/09 at 09:15 PM ET
That was just a great post. Well done Monkey.
Posted by Triple Deke Tyler from Lansing on 11/25/09 at 12:36 AM ET
Posted by monkey from Going rouge on 11/24/09 at 09:44 PM ET
Oh lord and then you outdid yourself. I’m beginning to think you aren’t an actual monkey.
Posted by Triple Deke Tyler from Lansing on 11/25/09 at 12:38 AM ET
I think we ought to stop blaming Bert for Dats’s troubles. Don’t get me wrong - the guy is horrific. No reason he should be wearing the Winged wheel. He just doesn’t seem to give a shit anymore and that can’t be good for the locker room. I’ve got no roomed for a giant that wont hit, a guy with moves that can’t get to the slot, a creative power forward who can’t pass the puck to anyone on his team.
But when it comes down to it, is it really Bert that is “slowing Dats down?” The only times I’ve seen #13 in the slot are just before his goals. (What a coincidence) Otherwise, he’s just hugging the damn boards. Maybe he’s just bored and wants to see who is in the front row. Maybe he’s suddenly afraid of wide open spaces. Who knows? All I know is that prior to this season I considered pasha one of best, if not the best, forwards in the league. But he’s clearly demonstrated that he can’t do it on his own. He can take a line consisting of decent talent, hoist them on his shoulders, and will the puck into the net. I still think he’s the best defensive forward in the league, but to be that kind of superstar he’s got to be able to be a gamechanger. That title this year goes to Z and Z alone.
And really if you are going to blame Bert for slowing down Dats… don’t you think the ultimate blame should land on Uncle Mike. Now, I’m not ragging on the guy - I know he knows what he’s doing. I know that in comparison, I know jack shit. But how *#$%@& frustrating is it to see Khan’s reports every other day of “Lineups in practice are ... Bertuzzi - Datsyuk - Holmstrom…” The line is ineffective, and causes too many turnovers. Maybe Babs realized that Dats’s defensive prowess will help him make up for Bert’s mistakes. I dunno. But on a team where we can’t seem to light the GD lamp… the solution seems obvious:
Fly, circus. Fly.
Dats apparently needs a sniper on his wing. Or he needs a playmaker to give him the puck when he’s already in the slot. He apparently is having a helluva time making Trevor Thompsons of other teams’ defensive corp like we’ve all seen him do before. So fine. Give him some help. Get that circus going. Make Bert ride the pine. Don’t even give him press box privileges; make him wash and wax everyone’s cars. Or do some reverse clockwork orange shit on him: Show him images of violent nasty hockey, play some ludwig van, and reward him for reacting positively. Until then, get him out.
Goin to the game tomorrow (I guess tonight actually…). Back in the motherland. Lets right this ship, bitches.
Go Wings.
Posted by CaptNorris5 from The Winged Wheel, stuck in Chicago on 11/25/09 at 02:42 AM ET
i wouldn’t mind seeing these lines:
Zetterman-Dats-Homer
Cleary-Helm-Miller
Bertuzzi-Abdelkader-Leino
May-Draper-Eaves
Posted by Itrusteddrrahmani from Nyc by way of A2 on 11/25/09 at 03:13 AM ET
The only thing is, we’re sad that Happy had to leave and ____ was the replacement.
Posted by Osrt on 11/25/09 at 12:26 AM ET
THIS. I blame him for nothing (except maybe the timing that enabled the league “investigation” to hamstring Holland a bit, but it was a confusing situation all around), certainly not for leaving for an opportunity that he thought might give him more playing time to develop.
I miss that spunky little guy. He was such a goofball. :(
Posted by Baroque from Michigan on 11/25/09 at 05:58 AM ET
UsedToBeBruisy isn’t going anywhere, and not because he’s an effective player. Between us and GR, we have no warm bodies to replace him and realistically play past April with either club. Once Christmas comes along and Mule’s, Wally’s, and J-Will’s legs start working again along with Tiny Tim’s? All bets are off. Then Gar-Tuzzi can be sent to the gulag. For now? Demote his sorry ass.
We took McCrimmon out of loyalty to Hossa. Now that he’s not here anymore, I see no reason to be loyal to McCrimmon and his Black Hole of Suck of a PK. Get rid of him and hire a blind hobo.
Point taken about Lilja from w2j2. We need Ericsson to start blocking shots like a madman to get the PK in at least decent shape. Either that or kidnap Volchenkov from Ottawa.
And if you’re ditching Zep, Stan Rogers. I pimped him before and I’ll pimp him again. Try him. He might get the job done. “Rise again…rise again…”
Posted by AndrewFromAnnArbor from Fortress Europe on 11/25/09 at 06:29 AM ET
If anything, fans should be applauding his commitment to the team instead of thinking of him as a “traitor”.
Speaking honestly I don’t view him as a traitor, and I can see why he did what he did…but a little more notice would have been nice. That being said, I look forward to him returning a more complete and stronger player that can play a consistent top-six wing at an absolute bargain in a year or two. Here’s hopin’ anyway.
And “Everybody’s Happy” always makes me smile. And shudder a little. Speaking of ugly, that’s our Happy Hooker.
Posted by monkey from Going rouge on 11/24/09 at 09:15 PM ET
You playin’ Calvinball near the river, or by the Ford plant?
Posted by AndrewFromAnnArbor from Fortress Europe on 11/25/09 at 06:31 AM ET
No apologies needed - one of the best photoshops ever. Always makes me aLOL (TM Tyler).
Posted by Baroque from Michigan on 11/25/09 at 06:57 AM ET
If any of the “19” are going to miss tonights fun with ATL - -
you know fun, like going to the Dentist fun, waiting in line at the DMV fun, being in a hurry at the grocery store while the 90 y/o lady in front of the checkout line tries to count out exact change with her arthritic hands fun, needing to desparately take a piss while watiing in an impossibly long line fun, having terrible gas while driving your awesome first date home from the restaurant fun,
Happy Thanksgiving
Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 11/25/09 at 07:32 AM ET
Well I’ll be damned, shocked, and amazed; Khan(!) did it, he called out the Wings PK.
The headline: Red Wings’ penalty kill takes step backward
The Detroit Red Wings didn’t expect to solve their penalty-killing problems overnight by reverting back to their 2007-08 form, when they ranked first in the NHL in that specialty.
But they anticipated significant improvement over last season’s surprisingly poor 78.3 percent success rate.
Instead, it has been worse—74.4 percent heading into Wednesday night’s game against the high-scoring Atlanta Thrashers at Joe Louis Arena.
An ominous note from Khan:
The last time the Red Wings finished a season with a worse penalty-killing percentage was in 1985-86. That was the 40-point club that finished last in the league and killed only 71.8 percent of opposition power plays.
Khan(!), purposesly or not, intentionally or not - -points the finger or responsibility.
First from Babs: “
We always had great penalty killing, and we haven’t had good penalty killing in two years,” Red Wings coach Mike Babcock said. “So we got to fix it. It’s the bottom line.”
Next from Draper: “
If anyone could figure out what the exact problem was, we’d have it fixed by now,” forward Kris Draper said. . .
“It’s not because of lack of desire or commitment to get the job done,” Draper said. “For whatever reason, it’s not working right now. We’re going to stay with it, and hopefully, we can get on a roll.
Hmm - - must be the friggin coach.
I can’t believe I am saying this - - Thank you Khan(!), thank you.
Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 11/25/09 at 07:44 AM ET
The sky is falling, the End is nigh, and the lemmings are in accord. The Free Press’ Helene St. James is on the story too: Red Wings’ penalty kill at bottom of NHL:
“. . . Offense has lacked lately—only five goals have been scored in regulation the past four games—but the penalty kill has been the big issue, falling to 28th overall in the league at 74.4% and last on the road at 65.7% after coughing up two goals in Monday’s 3-1 loss at Nashville. . .
She too indirectly points out responsibility:
It doesn’t help that in addition to Kronwall, fellow PKers Johan Franzen and Valtteri Filppula also are injured. But even before the sick bay swelled, the Wings struggled against opposing power plays—and did so last season, too, after being known for years as one of the league’s top penalty-killing teams.
Maybe the Organ-I-Zation is taking notes too - - you know there really isn’t anything wrong with mid-season coaching changes - - worked out pretty well for the Pen(i)s.
Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 11/25/09 at 07:52 AM ET
So I think this is humorous - and may be showing my age - but I’ll share anyway - since the “19” are ragging on UsedtobeBruisy.
At the 1:50 mark or thereabouts.
I see a little silhouetto of a man
Go ahead, click it, it is worth a chuckle or two.
Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 11/25/09 at 09:10 AM ET
Red Wings’ penalty kill takes step backward
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE?!?
My ol’ grandpappy, in his wisdom, always said, “You can’t fall off the floor.”
Posted by AndrewFromAnnArbor from Fortress Europe on 11/25/09 at 09:18 AM ET
you know there really isn’t anything wrong with mid-season coaching changes - - worked out pretty well for the Pen(i)s.
Sure Okie, but I’d bet you dollars to doughnuts that for every Dan Bylsma out there, there are ten Michel Therriens. They got lucky. Not every team is.
Posted by AndrewFromAnnArbor from Fortress Europe on 11/25/09 at 09:20 AM ET
True Andrew - - but fuch, the Wings aren’t looking to replace Uncle Mike, so how hard would it be to do some fuching research and hire an Asst. Coach that actually knows “D” and PK?
-or- since I am indulging in fantasy -
Get an Asst to take McClellan’s old spot, forwards and PP, and put MacLean back to D and PK - - that used to work really well.
Hell, I don’t really care - - just do something - - they can’t fall any farther than the floor right?
The McCrimmon hiring decision may be one of Tick Tock’s worst blunders ever, right next to signing UsedtobeBruisy.
Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 11/25/09 at 09:41 AM ET
Aw, siggy is gonna go and hurt the Cheif’s feelings. That’s not very nice.
AAA is right. McCrim was brought on board for the sake of Hossa. Well Hoss aint here no more, so no need to hold on to him. Coaches have to prove themselves just like the players do…well, most players. Those who aren’t threatening to eat the coach’s children anyway.
Posted by Nate A from Detroit-ish on 11/25/09 at 09:59 AM ET
You suck C3PO… you whiney *#$%@&.
Posted by siggy on 11/25/09 at 09:49 AM ET
I’d like to think that siggy got confused and somewhere out there on a Star Wars message board, there’s a completely out-of-context and well written post about the Detroit Red Wings.
Posted by J.J. from Kansas on 11/25/09 at 10:12 AM ET
My ol’ grandpappy, in his wisdom, always said, “You can’t fall off the floor.”
Posted by AndrewFromAnnArbor from Fortress Europe on 11/25/09 at 09:18 AM ET
There’s always the little hole to the basement.
Now about McCrimmon: fire him. He sucks.
He came to Detroit because of Hossa. Now let’s pretend Hossa injuries his shoulder again and has to stop playing hockey. How fast would Chicago get rid of Kopecky?
Posted by Guilherme from Brazsil on 11/25/09 at 10:17 AM ET
Posted by John W. from Lansing, MI on 11/24/09 at 11:02 PM ET
Lol. Sorry. The ref always gets me.
Posted by MarkK from Maryland on 11/25/09 at 06:17 AM ET
Between these two…I laughed so hard the dog is giving me looks.
Happy Thanksgiving 19.
Posted by mrfluffy from Long Beach on 11/25/09 at 10:36 AM ET
Speaking of Thanksgiving, will the Lions play tomorrow?
Posted by Guilherme from Brazsil on 11/25/09 at 10:38 AM ET
Speaking of Thanksgiving, will the Lions play tomorrow?
Posted by Guilherme from Brasil on 11/25/09 at 10:38 AM ET
The game will be televised. That doesn’t mean they’ll actually play.
Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!
Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 11/25/09 at 11:02 AM ET
Speaking of Thanksgiving, will the Lions play tomorrow?
It won’t be the same without John Wayne Stafford under center.
I went from thinking the guy was a frat guy douche to wanting to have his babies. Even if we get blown out by 40 I’ll still be grinning because of the Browns game.
Posted by Triple Deke Tyler from Lansing on 11/25/09 at 11:13 AM ET
Having been raised in S.E. Michigan (Marine City), the Lions and the Thanksgiving Day game are forever intertwined. Even moreso because I am so damn old, cable tv didn’t exist in my house until 1981, so there really wasn’t anything else to watch after the parades except for the Lions.
My mom passed away when I was a Sophomore in H.S., and I recall my Dad and I eating kielbasa at the Silverdome on Thanksgiving, watching the Lions.
Quick story, but funny as hell. I can’t recall exactly when it was (you’ll understand why if you keep reading), H.S. sometime, but me and a couple of buddies drove to the Silverdome for a WRIF tailgate party during the lockout once. So we are in my Mom’s Lincoln, my friend Mike is in the front seat, and Tim is in the back behind the drivers seat - - we have a half-gallon of Jack Daniels and a three ounce shot glass. On the way over we are playing odd/even (you know count to three and stick out two fingers or three), the loser taking shots of J.D. We were half-lit before we left, and Tim is goosing my seat the whole time, cluing me on the odd/even, so our friend Mike is losing non-stop, like 5 times in a row - - He was three sheets to the wind before we ever left 26 Mile road. Tim and I were laughing our asses off - maybe you had to be there.
I’ll watch the Lions tomorrow too - - and they’ll probably suck - - I really don’t ever expect them to win - - unlike my expectations for the Wings.
Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 11/25/09 at 11:39 AM ET
the Wings aren’t looking to replace Uncle Mike, so how hard would it be to do some fuching research and hire an Asst. Coach that actually knows “D” and PK?
Hence my blind hobo idea. I’m pretty sure we can get about fifty of them for what we’re paying McCrimmon, and if worse comes to worse, we can thrown them onto the ice to lurch toward the opponents stinking of urine, mumbling, occasionally shrieking illegibly, and asking for spare change. That ought to throw off their PP. At the very least, a blind hobo passed out in front of the crease will block a ton of shots.
Those who aren’t threatening to eat the coach’s children anyway.
I like to think that when William Tell left, he gave his blackmail photos of Uncle Mike and Kenny snorting coke off the backsides of tranny hookers to UsedToBeBruisy. That’s the only explanation—Gar-Tuzzi didn’t make a deal with the Devil because I’m pretty sure it’d be difficult to write up a contract with oneself as both parties. But then, you guys are the lawyers, not me.
There’s always the little hole to the basement.
No, you’re thinking of the corollary: “Every time I think I’ve hit bottom, somebody hands me a shovel.”
Two Minutes for Blogging is the worst name for a hockey blog in the world.
The game will be televised. That doesn’t mean they’ll actually play.
Good point Kate. Happy Turkey Day, all. Spare a bite of turkey and stuffing for those of us who re-embraced the yoke of oppression in the Old Country.
Posted by AndrewFromAnnArbor from Fortress Europe on 11/25/09 at 11:57 AM ET
And we could rest our best defensive forwards too.
“And the winner of the 2010 Selke Trophy for Best Defensive Foward is…No-Shoulders Smalltooth Jones!”
Posted by AndrewFromAnnArbor from Fortress Europe on 11/25/09 at 12:01 PM ET
AAA, I would have thought of the corollary if I knew it existed. Or what “corollary” is.
About the Lions, Bill Simmons has him beating the Packers. Given his recent performances, you’re doomed.
Off-topic: whati is the spread? Basically, what’s the meaning of “Lions (+10.5) over Packers”?
Off-topic 2: I assume the reminder on the about off-topics doesn’t apply to A2Y.
Posted by Guilherme from Brazsil on 11/25/09 at 12:12 PM ET
Khan(!) says Eaves is a healthy scratch tonight, Jimmah in net
Patrick Eaves is the healthy scratch at forward tonight against the Atlanta Thrashers, as Kirk Maltby returns to the lineup. It ends Eaves’ streak of seven straight games. Eaves leads all Detroit forwards with a plus-6 rating, second on the team to Nicklas Lidstrom’s plus-7.
Here are the line combinations:
Bertuzzi-Datsyuk-Holmstrom
Leino-Zetterberg-Cleary
Draper-Helm-Miller
May-Abdelkader-MaltbyOn defense, coach Mike Babcock indicated on Tuesday that it’ll be Nicklas Lidstrom-Jonathan Ericsson and Brad Stuart-Brian Rafalski. He’ll then rotate Lidstrom, Rafalski and Stuart to play with Brett Lebda and Derek Meech.
Jimmy Howard will start in goal.
Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 11/25/09 at 12:21 PM ET
We have back-to-back games later this week, right? Maybe Babs is just resting Eaves to play him on Datsyuk’s wing in Tuzzi’s place.
(Yeah, right)
Larry out, really? Damnit.
Posted by Guilherme from Brazsil on 11/25/09 at 12:27 PM ET
T-Bone - - if you were to make a wager on the game, and bet on the Lions, you would win if the Packers won the game by a final score of less than +10 i.e., DET 16, G.B. 26 = money for you.
Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 11/25/09 at 12:29 PM ET
Speaking of Thanksgiving, will the Lions play tomorrow?
Posted by Guilherme from Brasil on 11/25/09 at 10:38 AM ET
The game will be televised. That doesn’t mean they’ll actually play.
Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!
Posted by Kate from Pa. on 11/25/09 at 11:02 AM ET
Kate with the Post of the Moment™.
Posted by Primis on 11/25/09 at 12:36 PM ET
the Old Country.
Posted by AndrewFromAnnArbor from Fortress Europe on 11/25/09 at 11:57 AM ET
Man did that one bring back memories. That’s how my grandparents always referred to Ireland.
Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!
Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 11/25/09 at 12:39 PM ET
Joy oh Joy - - Wings face another hot goalie tonight (why?).
ATL Scoring DET
70 Total Goals 66
59 Opp. Goals 62
Are you fuching kidding me, ATL are +11, DET are +4 - - unfriggin real.
ATL DET
578 Shots On Goal 748
708 Opp. Shots On Goal 608
81 Power Play Opportunities 94
19 Power Play Goals 22
23.5% Power Play % 23.4%
82.7% Penalty Kill % 74.4%
Hot and Not:
Tobias Enstrom (D) 4 pts in last 3 GP
Pavel Kubina (D) 2 pts in last 3 GP
Maxim Afinogenov (RW/LW) 8 pts in last 5 GP
Nik Antropov (C/RW) 3 pts in last 2 GP
Vyacheslav Kozlov (LW) 4 pts in last 4 GP
Ondrej Pavelec (G) 1-0-2, 2.24, .942 in last 3 GPI
Brian Rafalski (D) 4 pts in last 5 GP
Pavel Datsyuk (C/LW) 14 pts in last 13 GP
Dan Cleary (LW/RW) 8 pts in last 8 GP
Brad Stuart (D) 1 pts in last 5 GP
Nicklas Lidstrom (D) 1 pts in last 4 GP
Tomas Holmstrom (LW/RW) 0 pts in last 5 GP
Todd Bertuzzi (LW/RW) 0 pts in last 4 GP
Chris Osgood (G) 0-2-1, 3.35, .863 in last 3 GPI
Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 11/25/09 at 12:39 PM ET
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Posted by MarkK from Maryland on 11/24/09 at 08:35 PM ET
The most annoying thing is that usually a franchise talent is the ONLY talented guy on the team - like Rick Nash and the four dwarfs, or Alex Ovechkin without anyone else or Gaborik on the Wild when they had no other scorers whatsoever. Pavel isn’t the only player on the team like that, just the only one on his line. Options exist to alleviate his frustration. They just aren’t being used.
Posted by Baroque from Michigan on 11/24/09 at 08:40 PM ET