Abel to Yzerman
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Now Is Not The Right Time To Grow Up
by IwoCPO on 05/20/08 at 10:46 AM ET
Comments (58)
Look. It’s not like we didn’t see this coming. It’s not as if we expected that the Finals would, umm, refine us as a group of 19 Wing fans. So we have a choice. We can raise our level of conversation. We can combat the evil hordes at Pensblog with statistical references and mythical powerpoint presentations dating back to the 2003 draft…
...or we can fall back on what we know. We can let our instincts guide us to that haven of juvenilacity where we feel warm and secure.
Me?
I choose the latter. Bitches.
Thanks TeamDub.
Here’s the deal. There are 19 of us and 870, 000 of them. I counted. We cannot combat them with quantity, only quality. This will not become a photoshop duel, but rather a battle of childish wit. Contradiction of terms? To some, perhaps.
. We’ll run them at select times.
And when the games finally begin...in like a month...thanks Gary. Ass....well, then firetrucks and puppies and hookers and Michigan brewed Ale will be our just rewards.
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Comments
This might be the best line I have ever read from a Detroit hockey writer:
“Pittsburgh got Crosby and Malkin the old-fashioned way: by sucking.”
So true...so true. Wings in 5.
There is a part of me that is disappointed the WCF are over...I was enjoying taunting all of the Stars in Texas.
Posted by John in Austin from Austin, Texas on 05/20/08 at 10:02 AM ET
Are you coming to the D for Game 1?
Working it. Tense negotiations are underway.
Posted by IwoCPO from Washington, DC on 05/20/08 at 10:05 AM ET
Heh, thanks Chief - ‘twas my pleasure.
I plan on taking the ‘shops to a new, uncharted level of crudeness and immaturity.
‘Wings in 5.
Posted by TeamDub from The gratch. on 05/20/08 at 10:05 AM ET
I know you don’t have any options as to what ads the NHL store shows in your jump between story and comments, but the Pens Conference Champion hat? Really?
Posted by scsgoal31 from Huntington Woods, MI on 05/20/08 at 10:16 AM ET
This might be the best line I have ever read from a Detroit hockey writer:
“Pittsburgh got Crosby and Malkin the old-fashioned way: by sucking.”
I was just about to post that quote. Brilliant, just brilliant.
Posted by Modnar from Cincinnati, OH on 05/20/08 at 10:19 AM ET
Not only by sucking, but by keeping Malkin in Russia after drafting him so they could suck a second year in a row and cash in on Crosby 
Posted by scsgoal31 from Huntington Woods, MI on 05/20/08 at 10:28 AM ET
Scott Burnside at ESPN has picked the Pens in seven. Hope Melrose picks the Pens.
Posted by hockeychic from Denver, CO on 05/20/08 at 10:31 AM ET
Not only by sucking, but by keeping Malkin in Russia after drafting him so they could suck a second year in a row and cash in on Crosby
Ok, I have to fix that statement by me. They got Crosby because that season wasn’t played, so they got the most balls into the lottery to win Crosby. They got Jordan because they sucked that year too.
Posted by scsgoal31 from Huntington Woods, MI on 05/20/08 at 10:32 AM ET
in the immortal words of the hobo in Bugs Bunny:
“Pen-gui-ins is practic-ally chicken”
Posted by wingsfanindenver from 'lancheland on 05/20/08 at 10:40 AM ET
I hate to say this, but I just took a look at the “Pensblog”. Those guys look like a bunch of retards. Seriously.
Posted by TDeters on 05/20/08 at 10:48 AM ET
The hordes of ignorant Texans with piss-poor excuses for brains are vanquished! Bring on the hordes of ignorant Pennsylvanians with piss-poor excuses for brains. And oh boy, Penisblog (oh gee, did I put in an extra ‘I’ in there?) is full of them. They’ll be showing up soon-- their advance scouts from Serbia have already arrived to talk trash badly and be ignored. Boy, Eastern European labor-- you get what you pay for. Well, bring ‘em all on, I say, we’re ready for ‘em. Pithy pureile suggestions shall be forthcoming.
Let the Battle of the Rust Belt commence!
Posted by AndrewFromAnnArbor from the Library of Disgusting Bodily Functions on 05/20/08 at 10:54 AM ET
Ahhhh, I love how the internet connects us all!
Passed on to you “The 19” (plus us trolls), from a non-registered “wooter” to a rare Kukla/A2Y poster…
http://s3.amazonaws.com/wootfiles/20080519-rh0yza.mp3
Let’s Go Red Wings!!!!!
Posted by arcane_caf from NoVa - Outside D.C. on 05/20/08 at 10:56 AM ET
“and” a rare Kukla/A2Y poster…
Posted by arcane_caf from NoVa - Outside D.C. on 05/20/08 at 11:01 AM ET
I drew some cartoons for you chief. i have no idea how to do a photoshop. but my scanner’s not working right now, i will send them to you later.
Posted by scheisskopf on 05/20/08 at 11:04 AM ET
“their advance scouts from Serbia have already arrived to talk trash badly and be ignored.”
Yeah, I was wondering about that…
Posted by AndrewB from TN on 05/20/08 at 11:08 AM ET
“I drew some cartoons for you chief.”
If this was not said tongue in cheek than I greatly anticipate this. If it’s not for real just reading the above gave me a good laugh.
Posted by AndrewB from TN on 05/20/08 at 11:10 AM ET
I know you don’t have any options as to what ads the NHL store shows in your jump between story and comments, but the Pens Conference Champion hat? Really?
ads? there are ads on this blog?
I had no idea…
Posted by PaulinMiamiBeach on 05/20/08 at 11:19 AM ET
Go Penguins.
Posted by Kyle from Tomah,WI on 05/20/08 at 11:32 AM ET
Did someone say photoshop? The gears are starting to turn.....
Thanks for the shout out in the other post chief!
Go Wings!
Posted by aaron from phoenix, that makes me a transplant on 05/20/08 at 11:38 AM ET
ads? there are ads on this blog?
I had no idea…
http://getfirefox.com
Haha..work computers suck. Firefox lives on all my personal machines though.
Posted by scsgoal31 from Huntington Woods, MI on 05/20/08 at 11:59 AM ET
juvenilacity
I’m good with that.
Time for the post series visit to Betty Ford for the three day refresher. A little R&R;as it be. Although, I must say after four visit in two months the staff is starting to ask questions. Apparently, repeat business is not their forte.
Posted by Rumbear from Sandy Eggo on 05/20/08 at 12:14 PM ET
it’s for real andrew, i spent my time in school drawing stupid pictures rather than doing any work. my grades reflected this very well. and i got suspended a couple times when drawings of faculty found their way into the wrong hands!
Posted by scheisskopf on 05/20/08 at 12:21 PM ET
Detroit fans cheer for their team and are above degrading the opposition. Detroit fans know their hockey and respect the game too much to do that. Besides, Sidney Crosby reminds us of a young Steve Yzerman.
From daddy Kukla at his NHL blog.
Posted by Osrt on 05/20/08 at 12:45 PM ET
We certainly know our hockey… I’ll leave it at that.
I appreciate the level of juvenilicity over at Pensblog. I put in a few respectful comments over there. I like them up until Saturday, and from then I hate them until the series is over. Then we can be friends again.
Posted by Nathan from Jonny Ericsson's ice cream truck on 05/20/08 at 12:54 PM ET
Uh… we can be friends again as long as nobody goes Claude Lemieux on one of our players.
Posted by Nathan from Jonny Ericsson's ice cream truck on 05/20/08 at 12:55 PM ET
scheisskopf,
Bring it! Looking forward to it after checking out Pensblog.
Posted by AndrewB from TN on 05/20/08 at 01:11 PM ET
I was looking in on a Pens/Flyers game a few nights ago. My kid, who’s been watching hockey and pulling for the Wings since she was a week old (she’s 6 now), asked who was playing. When I told her, she said “I love the Penguins!” I told her (loudly) that was grounds for immediate disowning and that she was no longer my daughter. She said, “But they are cute and fat and slide around on their bellies!” As long as that’s all they do in the finals...but she’s still on my sh1t list.
GO WINGS!
Posted by WingBitch from Virginia on 05/20/08 at 01:29 PM ET
As long as that’s all they do in the finals...but she’s still on my sh1t list.
LOL
reminds me of a quote from a commercial...dad says to son: “remember how we’re not supposed to play favorites? well, right now you’re #3.”
Posted by PaulinMiamiBeach on 05/20/08 at 01:38 PM ET
I just realized I have 87 points in my hockey pool. Is that a good thing or bad?
Posted by jmara85 on 05/20/08 at 01:43 PM ET
one thing I meant to mention last night and forgot. not sure I dare say it, but…
Lilja had a solid game last night.
Posted by PaulinMiamiBeach on 05/20/08 at 02:13 PM ET
… Sidney Crosby reminds us of a young Steve Yzerman.
Hmm, doesn’t Crosby enjoy diving a bit too much for that comparison to hold?
If I had any photoshop skills I would use this photo. Hopefully it can inspire someone.
Posted by lilja4ever on 05/20/08 at 02:17 PM ET
Well, I’ve been posting over on Pensblog. I gotta tell you guys, you’d be proud of them. They’re juvenile when it’s required, but also willing to talk some plain old hockey respectfully. A lot like us over here.
One guy did wish that I’d die in a fire. So that wasn’t so great. But hey, it’s playoff time, and come Saturday when the puck drops, I will wish the same upon him.
Posted by Nathan from Jonny Ericsson's ice cream truck on 05/20/08 at 02:21 PM ET
I’d set my neighbor’s house on fire and suffer the consequences tomorrow if the Wings are up 2-0 after 1.
Posted by IwoCPO from Washington, DC on 05/19 at 08:08 PM
Anyone know what Chiefs neighbors house looks like today???
I watched the game outside at home on the patio, and my neighbors need not ask what team scored (again & again...... and again). But the Z shortie cost me a beer.... and I’d just opened it too. Damn a brick patio can mess with a beer.....
Posted by MOWingsfan19 on 05/20/08 at 02:36 PM ET
I can’t believe we have 6 days to wait for game 1...I couldn’t fall asleep after the game last night.
Thanks Gary, ...
Posted by WingInTO from Toronto on 05/20/08 at 02:48 PM ET
MOWings, don’t know exactly what Chief’s neighbors house looks like today but based on the picture he posted @8:53pm in last nights Live Blog, I’ve got a pretty good idea.
Posted by Mike from La-La Land on 05/20/08 at 03:06 PM ET
Lilja had a solid game last night.
OOOOOOoooo...Paul…
Posted by WingBitch from Virginia on 05/20/08 at 03:07 PM ET
I can’t believe we have 6 days to wait for game 1
I think you should return your calendar from wherever you bought it. the game is in 4 days.
Posted by PaulinMiamiBeach on 05/20/08 at 03:23 PM ET
In Pauls defence here, Lilja didn’t have a bad game at least.
And I somewhat agree with Nathan, there is some legit puck talk “over there"… some. The digression to juvenility makes it more fun anyway.
Mike,
The 8:53 photo looks plenty warm enough for a Turkey roast???
Posted by MOWingsfan19 on 05/20/08 at 04:02 PM ET
I wasn’t disputing Lilja’s performance. I was proud of all of them last night. Simply marveling at Paul’s huevos in making a point to say so about Lily.
On another note, reflecting on my daughter being on my sh1t list, I think she can come off of it now. I was remembering how she jumped up and down on the couch during the 1st period screaming at Dallas through the TV. “Get the black headed guys! Get the stupid cheese heads! Go Red Wings!” And she has been known to yell at live games: “Get’em! Stick ‘em! Kill ‘em!” So, I can’t disown her. She’s cool.
Posted by WingBitch from Virginia on 05/20/08 at 04:14 PM ET
I think you should return your calendar from wherever you bought it. the game is in 4 days.
Thanks - Canadian holiday yesterday so I still think it’s Monday. And the game day still counts as a wait day, dammit! I guess I should be thankful it it means that we might get Mule back sooner in the series.
Posted by WingInTO from Toronto on 05/20/08 at 04:17 PM ET
Well, I’ve been posting over on Pensblog.
I already have some of my commentary for the LBs pre-typed and ready for copy-and-paste whenever the situation calls for it:
Pittsburgh goal [because they sucked ass in 01-02] scored by # 19, Ryan Whitney!
Pittsburgh goal [because they sucked ass in 03-04] scored by # 71, Evgeni Malkin!
Pittsburgh goal [because they sucked ass in 03-04] scored by #87, Cindy Crosby!
Pittsburgh goal [because they sucked ass in 05-06] scored by #11, Jordan Staal!
Pittsburgh goaltender [because they sucked ass in 02-03] Marc-Andre Fleury with a great save!
Posted by O-Joe on 05/20/08 at 05:01 PM ET
Hey, guys, we’ll be up to our usual ways over there for the series.
The hatred we have for the Sens, Rangers, and Flyers is tenfold what we have for the Red Wings.
So it’ll be plain-old hatred for the team standing in the way of the Stanley Cup.
We have every intent on keeping things somewhat tame over there, until Kris Draper starts getting away with crosschecks to the face.
Saturday will be a whole different story.
We know the game.
But we bring it in a different way.
It’s why we prosper.
Posted by Pensblog on 05/20/08 at 05:07 PM ET
Saturday will be a whole different story.
Oh, yes. It’s Whiny Cindy’s coming out party for the SCF isn’t it? Hard to forget that given how the media hypes the little diver every chance they get.
Will Little Gary (Ass) be the Master of Ceremonies for Friday night’s Debutante Ball?
Posted by O-Joe on 05/20/08 at 05:23 PM ET
The hatred we have for the Sens, Rangers, and Flyers is tenfold what we have for the Red Wings.
Same can be said here for Bubba Jr, Bubba Sr and the Dive. Have a good series. Looking forward to all that comes with it.
We also know the game, but aren’t real adult about how we reflect that knowledge.
We may not prosper, but it’s how we roll.
Posted by IwoCPO from Washington, DC on 05/20/08 at 05:24 PM ET
I can’t wait for Chelios to show his stuff ... is he using a cane or a straight walker this series?
Posted by dubs on 05/20/08 at 06:01 PM ET
When I told her, she said “I love the Penguins!” I told her (loudly) that was grounds for immediate disowning and that she was no longer my daughter. She said, “But they are cute and fat and slide around on their bellies!”
You can’t disown her for that - she’s 100% correct. Google “Adelie penguin” and tell me that isn’t the sweetest, more adorable little bird you ever saw. Jackass penguins, macaroni penguins - they are all adorable. Cute as the chipmunks of the avian world.
Course, they aren’t nearly as cute after they get chewed up by a leopard seal, but everyone has to eat something, so que sera, sera.
Posted by Baroque from Michigan on 05/20/08 at 08:35 PM ET
is he using a cane or a straight walker this series?
He’s going to be using a mahogany cane with a carved ivory snake handle like the effin Pimp he is, bish smack all you hoes and jump in his purple caddy. Thanks for asking.
Posted by Osrt on 05/21/08 at 02:06 AM ET
No trash talk from me. I just gave my prediction. Like almost all of you did. And I don’t know why my location disqualifies me from discussion.
One geographical lesson for the end: Serbia is not in the Eastern Europe. Pavel Datsyuk is from Eastern Europe. And of course, I don’t mean it in the negative way as most of you do. I would expect more respect for that part of the world from fans of the team that was revived with the help from many Russian players.
Posted by Kosta from Surcin, Serbia on 05/21/08 at 03:18 AM ET
Serbia counts as Eastern Europe if you go by the old Cold War delineation of East and West - probably now it counts more as central or southern Europe, but the old view still has influence.
Posted by Baroque from Michigan on 05/21/08 at 03:43 AM ET
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Are you coming to the D for Game 1?
Posted by jmara85 on 05/20/08 at 09:56 AM ET