Abel to Yzerman
Next entry: Breaking News From Dallas: They're Still Bitter
Previous entry: Concerns? Yeah, I've Got A Few...But Only A Few
Stoney and Wojo Welcome Your Pal and Mine….Little Gary Bettman
by IwoCPO on 05/21/08 at 03:41 PM ET
Comments (14)
90 minutes from now (1700 EST) on WDFN Stoney and Wojo will be interviewing Gary Bettman, the greatest commissioner in the history of professional sports commissionerism.
Don’t know if they’ll be opening up the phone lines, but if they do? Well, if they do…
...maybe you’d like to ask him:
--Why the hell the Pistons and Wings are playing on the same nights, on three consecutive nights?
--When Detroit is moving to the Eastern Conference so that the two best tandems of forwards in the world can meet 4 or even 8 times/year in the regular season?
--Just how much of his ass can Tomas Holmstrom shove in a French goalie’s face and not get whistled, even if said ass isn’t hovering over pertinent blue-shaded area, or making contact with aforementioned French goalie?
--How much value the league, the fans, the players gained from the lockout he orchestrated?
Those are just a few that come to mind, and they’re the obvious ones. Clearly, any caller who closes with “Hey...thanks for your time Gary. Ass,” will be publicly acknowledged as the hero they are.
Filed in: | Abel to Yzerman | Permalink
Comments
OMG i need to stream this and try to call in. thankfully, my daughter has an upper respiratory infection and i took vacation time to stay home today with her.
Posted by RWBill from jabbing a six inch sewing needle into my eye. on 05/21/08 at 03:18 PM ET
I want to know if the league is going to speed up production on “Sudden Death II” starring Jean Claude Van Damme. In this one, Van Damme is going to fight Al the Octopus!
And if you have no idea what I’m talking about, here’s a clip from the first “Sudden Death” (yes, this was an actual movie): http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eftKwZzT15U
Posted by Matt from Chicago on 05/21/08 at 03:19 PM ET
Seeing as our hobbit-sized commissioner fears the cephelapod (brings new meaning to the title “Octopussy"), I wish Wojo would dunk a bucket of octopi on tiny Gary and watch him shrink like the green witch of Oz. Or maybe that’s why he comes pre-shrunk. I can’t keep up with all the mythologies of commissioneering.
Posted by JimS on 05/21/08 at 03:25 PM ET
That is one Pissed Off Penguin. I’m a little surprised a world class kick boxer like VanDamm had that much trouble with a fluffy, padded mascot, but you never know.
Posted by RWBill from jabbing a six inch sewing needle into my eye. on 05/21/08 at 03:29 PM ET
I remember seeing that movie when I was a kid. Wow. Extra points for the obscure JCVD reference.
Posted by John in Austin from Austin, TX on 05/21/08 at 04:09 PM ET
Hey, We could live-blog Lil Gary on Stoney and Wojo.
He is really pissed about the Pistons / Wings overlap.
Posted by w2j2 on 05/21/08 at 04:20 PM ET
“Sudden Death” is an obscure JCVD reference?
I didn’t think it was all that obscure. I must be even less cool than I thought.
Posted by Clark on 05/21/08 at 04:23 PM ET
Stevie Y on Hockeycentral at noon podcast.
Use one of these links iTunes cuts off #19. Yes I complained to iTunes already.
http://qml.quiettouch.com/files/radio/fan590/podcasts/hockeycentral/hockeycentral.xml
http://www.fan590.com/onair/hockeycentral/
Posted by Ron Landrus from Toledo on 05/21/08 at 05:08 PM ET
Clark, buddy, you’re posting on a (ice) hockey blog at 5:23 in the afternoon, and the rest of us are reading it, are any of us threats to break into the world of Cool?
Posted by RWBill from jabbing a six inch sewing needle into my eye. on 05/21/08 at 05:10 PM ET
Stoney and Wojo proved themselves to be just as stupid as Little Gary.
Of all the questions they asked him, he gave one only one legit answer, and they were too dense to understand what he was saying.
The league signed a contract with Versus/NBC for the ‘08 Finals over a year ago in which Versus/NBC would get a Sat/Mon/Wed/etc. schedule, relative to when the two Conference Finals ended. They didn’t have a choice as far as changing the games to Sat/Tues/Thurs or Fri/Sun/Tues.
The NBA, on the other hand, had two series to work with, and likely had more leeway. But in all likelihood, they were unable to move their two series around for the same type of contractual agreements with ESPN and TNT.
Little Gary deserves a lot of shit. For the schedule. For the lockout. For not letting Balsillie move a team to the West so the Wings can go East. For inconsistencies in officiating that he’s promoted and fostered. For so many more things.
But for this whole Pistons/Wings on the same night deal? Quit it already. We’ve got two good teams in this town. We’re fortunate to have this problem. It ain’t Gary’s fault.
Posted by Nathan from Jonny Ericsson's ice cream truck on 05/22/08 at 08:00 AM ET
Why on earth would anyone spend money (not to mention time) watching seven foot tall freaks stand around, miss free throws, act as though they were hit by a runaway truck when barely touched, wait to play hard until the last ten minutes of the game and endure dozens and dozens of timeouts when they could watch the STANLEY CUP FINALS in person?
No accounting for taste…
Posted by knowntome from west of MI on 05/22/08 at 06:25 PM ET
Add a Comment
Please limit embedded image or media size to 575 pixels wide.
Add your own avatar by joining Kukla's Korner, or logging in and uploading one in your member control panel.
Captchas bug you? Join KK or log in and you won't have to bother.
Most Recent Blog Posts
73 Men Sailed Up For This Live Blog and It Was 19 Who Led Them
Bartender, Statesman, Instigator…Voox
If The Sun Refused To Shine…We’d Live Blog
Jimmy D: “We’d Be Happy With A Top Ten Pick”
Swine Flu Or Not? The Levee’s Gonna Break And We’re Gonna Live Blog It
About Abel to Yzerman
Welcome to Abel to Yzerman, a Red Wing blog since 1977. No other site on the internet has better-researched, fact-laden and better prepared discussions than A2Y. Re-phrase: we do little research, find facts and stats highly overrated and claim little to no preparation. There are 19 readers of A2Y. No more, no less. All of them, except maybe one, are juvenile in nature. Reminding them of that in the comment section will only encourage them to prove that. Your suggestions and critiques are welcome:
A2Y Stuff
-----------------------------
Wanna Feel Smart?
Does confusion make you sad? When you read words like "enigma" and phrases like "Thanks Gary. Ass", do you wonder why mean people speak in languages you don't understand? Fret no longer friend! The A2Y Glossary will bring you great joy and enlightenment.
-----------------------------
How Others View The A2Y 19
"Hell, I guarantee the content co-opters at Abel to Yzerman were about to link this article under the heading “Bitter Blues Fans” again right up until they just read that last half-sentance. Thanks but no thanks, you Kukla hangers-on."
--St. Louis Game Time
"I realize it’s the slow summer season, but can this guy tone down the tough-guy histrionics? His posts are fatiguing on an otherwise excellent site."
--A2Y Fan, Eternal_Fields
"I constantly marvel at how Bill (IwoCPO) and his disciples at Abel To Yzerman can be so pompous and full of themselves throughout every regular season, but come playoff time they collapse into wavering puddles of stress and nervousness as they anxiously await the impending and unavoidable collapse of the Red Wings in the post-season."
--Mile High Hockey
"I hate them because they are better than us. Of all the frigging teams…"
--In The Cheap Seats
"It's just a shame that the most classless, uneducated, lowbrow fanbase in the league gets this sweep. Red Wing fans don't deserve their team."
--Thhom
"I really don’t care what fans or bloggers think."
--Drew Sharp
"Why is it you Detroit fans are still so classless when you have such a classy hockey team, with such a professional GM and gentlemen players? I understand that the author of this blog is a manner-less cad, but the rest of you should be better."
--A2Y Fan, Jeff Beaumont
"Have you ever *read* A2Y? Its the most opinionated, juvenile stuff i've read."
--Paul Nicholson
"I actually like the Detroit team and have a sh&% load of respect for them, but their fans are the biggest douches next to Canadians."
--KStewy, PensBlog Commenter
"Just when it looks like we have bottomed out, the 19 hit a new low."
-A2Y legend, Hockeytown Todd
"And for the record, I don't hate the Red Wings, I hate their fans."
--Douche Bag at Puck Daddy who isn't Wyshynski
"You’re nothing but a douchebag ****, c3po. Go f**k yourself, and learn something about hockey in the process. Nothing ruins my day more than seeing your byline on the kk page."
--Hector, A2Y fan, statesman, Pittsburgh Chapter of Jonas Brothers Fan Club President
"I can just imagine the kindergarten teacher’s reaction when the tyke blurts out 'Mommy says Gary Bettman is a f*cking f*ckface! He wants to give ‘Rosby the bad touch.' ”
--Bella, of the 19
Head to Hockeytown
Blogs the Chief Likes
If I heard someone end a call that way, I probably would drive off the road because of laughing so hard. Thanks Chief, and thanks Gary. Ass. For everything you do to us fans. There, I feel better now.
Posted by Jeff from Loveland, CO on 05/21/08 at 02:56 PM ET