Motherf***er should be on there.  I enjoyed the long explination of where/when/how it fits in there.  It could prove useful during the playoffs....

Posted by eyesris from Chestertown, MD on 02/27/08 at 02:32 PM ET

Can’t think of anything to add atm but, Bubba’s barn is no longer the Gaylord Entertainment Center.

Posted by Sp4r7an on 02/27/08 at 02:33 PM ET

Hmmmmm…

Little Gary aka Gary. Ass.

Stress Train

Open toed ungulates. 
Okay, I just like saying that last one.

Posted by Rumbear from Sandy Eggo on 02/27/08 at 02:46 PM ET

MotherF***er is definitely a worthy addition, along with an explanation of uses for all verb and noun tenses.

Speaking of which, I saw a video once on You Tube that was a farce of the Armstrong landing on the moon. In the video, the second his foot hit, he says, “Holy Mother of F***!!” Funniest thing I’ve ever seen.

Sparty: The Gay will always be the Gay. I’m not changing it.

Posted by IwoCPO from Washington, DC on 02/27/08 at 02:48 PM ET

Yep, I agree, that…

1)Gary. Ass.

2)Stress Train

3)MotherF***er

should all be added.

Also:

Ass Can

Posted by cementslinger from Midland MI on 02/27/08 at 03:04 PM ET

I like Ass Can. That one is actually a little bit funny.

I think The Idiot Horde should be added, but I don’t know who it applies more toward - Avs fans or Wings fans.

“Canadiacs” should be added to everyone’s lexicon, as the average Canadian hockey fan is the most arrogant, ignorant, annoying pile of trash in sports.

Finally, I think you might be well-served to switch “IwoCPO” to “Sgt Trailer Trash” or perhaps “DuiGED”.

Posted by Thomas on 02/27/08 at 03:24 PM ET

Thomas, have no fear.  You’ll have your own entry. Now there’s a phrase I believe you’ve heard many times in the past.

Posted by IwoCPO from Washington, DC on 02/27/08 at 03:30 PM ET

At the risk of acknowledging Thhhhhhhom’s exsitence, Ass Can definately has to go into the glossary.

The Gay must stay (that’ll make quite the chant at Bubba games when they finally start talking publicly about moving the team).

Drew Sharp deserves an entry as something straight-forward, like “The Mouth-Breather That Watches Three Regular Season Wings Games Per Year and Then Has the Gall to Act Like He’s Some Sort of Authority on the Wings Even Though it’s Pretty Obvious to Even the Most Casual of Wings Fans That He Doesn’t Know How to Hold a Hockey Stick”.

We have the Diggers, but need an entry for the Anti-Digger, Bruce MacLeod. And preferrably, some sort of immature entry that insults his paper for not sending him on the road trips, thus depriving us from actual quality Wing reporting (you know, given the circumstance that Hahn is still around).

Posted by Nathan on 02/27/08 at 03:38 PM ET

Seeing as how I have to live down here in Predaturd land (hey, that should go on the list too!), I think that the name of their arena could be tweaked a bit.  Since it’s no longer the Gaylord Entertainment Center, and is now called the Sommet (so may) Center, I have started calling in the SoGay Center.  It still fits in my opinion

Posted by Chris, reader #19 from Columbia, Tennessee on 02/27/08 at 03:42 PM ET

Chris, you have no idea how proud I am right now.  “SoGay” is going in.

Posted by IwoCPO from Washington, DC on 02/27/08 at 03:45 PM ET

Thanks, Chief.  I appreciate that.  Not bad for the new guy, eh?

Posted by Chris, reader #19 from Columbia, Tennessee on 02/27/08 at 03:50 PM ET

I agree with Nathan, MacLeod needs some sort of moniker—sometimes in the GDT, I refer to him as “Bruce Almighty”.  But Nathan is right, his moniker needs some sort of reference to his cheap ass fish wrap for not sending him on the roadtrips.  Baroque is really good at that sort of thing, She might have a good suggestion.

Speaking of Baroque, one my personal favorites of her quips is the one she uses to describe Bab’s unitelligible sentences:  “Yoda Syntax” Spot-on, and I recommend for inclusion.

Mother@#$ker is good.  But to get the most out of the label you have to include the rest of the quote:  “Because, motherf&*kers, that’s how I roll.”

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Hockey Netherworld on 02/27/08 at 04:19 PM ET

Here’s one that is a little bit of a tribute to “The Czech Miracle of Insanity” in regards to Dom.  How about “The Swedish Meatball of Confusion” in regards to Lilja.  He’s always skating around like he has no idea he’s playing hockey, and when he does something stupid, which is often, he ends up with that mouth-agape look on his face like he has no idea what just happened, a little confused, if you will.

Posted by Chris, reader #19 from Columbia, Tennessee on 02/27/08 at 04:24 PM ET

Additions- Ass.  Ass Can.  Happy.  Mother@#$ker.  Transplants (i.e., the people who make sell-outs possible in places like Denver, Phoenix, Nashville, etc.).  Douchebag (i.e., Andy Strickland- though maybe not the best idea to encourage him by giving him his own entry in the A2Y glossary...).

Deletions- Delma Huddle.

Posted by mudshark from Divetown, Colorado on 02/27/08 at 04:30 PM ET

Damn Chris is good. SoGay is an improvement and I LOVE The Swedish Meatball of Confusion. Brilliant. That being said you must go because you are making those of us that have been here awhile and have contributed nothing, look bad.

Posted by Sp4r7an on 02/27/08 at 04:42 PM ET

Garcia, anybody?

Posted by cementslinger from Midland MI on 02/27/08 at 04:43 PM ET

Oh an Tommy, are you making a full comeback or are you only going to visit us when the Wings are doing bad? I hope it’s a full comeback, I miss your impartial and intelligent analysis.

Posted by Sp4r7an on 02/27/08 at 04:45 PM ET

The SoGay Center is brilliant.

I’ve never been more proud of the Chief for stealing and taking credit for someone else’s work before.

Spartan, you have to call him “Thhhhom”. The extra h’s make it sound lispy.

Posted by Nathan on 02/27/08 at 04:57 PM ET

I’m surprised “Sasquatch” isn’t on there.

And don’t forget “The Poultry”.

Posted by BuzzFledderjohn on 02/27/08 at 06:10 PM ET

Thanks, Chief.  I appreciate that.  Not bad for the new guy, eh?

Posted by Chris, reader #19

I think Chris should be promoted to Reader #18 for the SoGay suggestion.

Posted by OlderThanChelios from Grand Rapids on 02/27/08 at 07:48 PM ET

Oh an Tommy, are you making a full comeback or are you only going to visit us when the Wings are doing bad? I hope it’s a full comeback, I miss your impartial and intelligent analysis.

I, for one, am giddily awaiting Thhhhhommy boy’s in-depth dissection of the Nordilanche’s current youth movement…

Maybe Uwe Krupp could drop drog sledding for a few months?

Please, PLEASE make the playoffs, Dive.

Posted by TeamDub from The gratch. on 02/27/08 at 09:08 PM ET

That being said you must go because you are making those of us that have been here awhile and have contributed nothing, look bad.

Agreed. I’ve done nothing but share fetishes, drug habits and a penchant for saying motherf&$r;/in’. Wait, that should mean I get my number retired here…

Does Huddler get a entry under Oompa Loompa? It should go right under the Enigma.

Posted by Osrt on 02/28/08 at 01:20 AM ET

How’d Sasquatch get deleted?  That must have been an accident.  Delma Huddle is already gone, good to see.

SoGay is possibly the best entry we’ve had so far.

Motherf***er can only be included with context, so it has to go in as “Because, Motherf***ers, that’s how I roll.”

I’d suggest that MBCQOTD goes in, but it’s sorta already covered under Babblecock.

I was going to suggest ‘Transplants’ as well, so glad to see it’s got a first endorsement.

Ass Can, Garcia, maybe Dater’s Rental Rant, all need to go in.  Have to immortalize the idiot scene surround the Dive.

I’d just as soon not see us give Thhhommy the attention he craves, so don’t think that he needs his own entry-- but ‘Spreadsheet’ certainly does.  Perhaps right under the entry for ‘Still Waiting.’

Another one for you to steal, Chief: Hat-Trick Dick.

I still like my previous suggestion of William Tell-- Samuelsson is rapidly giving Lilja a run for his money as the team goat.  But nobody else seems to be using it, so maybe not.

An entry for the current horrendous injury bug so we can commemorate it would be good, but I’m having trouble thinking of anything clever right now.

We need the human dictionary/thesaurus/Encyclopedia Michiganica though, otherwise we don’t have a prayer.  Baroque!  BAROQUE!

Posted by AndrewFromAnnArbor from the library of rich mahogany and leather-bound boo on 02/28/08 at 03:50 AM ET

I’m no good at making stuff up out of thin air.

For MacLeod, I can’t hear that name without thinking of the movie and the television spinoff, and since his employer is too cheap to actually send him on the road, what about the Shafted Highlander?  Really obscure, I know - but there is only one real journalist in the bunch.

For the injury bug…

I don’t know.  There are so many injury names that are funny on their own, even though the diseases themselves are far from amusing.  Sometimes if I feel under the weather I say I have Ebola, just because it is so unlikely that people know I’m joking.

RAID = Rink Aggravated Inflammatory Disorder? 

Nah.  Lame.  Somebody else can come up with a clever acronym.

You could just use the word “contagion” because it implies a spread from one person to another, of an infectious disease or even a behaviour, doctrine, or emotional state.  It doesn’t have to necessarily be the same injury, just the quality of being injured.  It sounds a little sinister, though, and the term has been used in a lot of science fiction stories.

Although it doesn’t apply to this team, I have used a made-up injury term for guys who aren’t quite right and seem to be nursing something (but later turns out they were completely healthy) - I figure he has a “strained motivator cuff.” Could apply to other teams, anyway.

Posted by Baroque from Michigan on 02/28/08 at 06:59 AM ET

We need a term for the odd time dilation that happens when a guy get injured, too, and “seven to ten days” mutates into three weeks or more.  It’s like the Wings measure injury time in dog years.

Posted by Baroque from Michigan on 02/28/08 at 07:47 AM ET

For the injury bug, what about:

Fully
Unfortunate
Contagion
Knocking-out
Each
Defenseman

How is that for an acronym?

Dan

Posted by ITDeuce from Michigan on 02/28/08 at 08:18 AM ET

I believe that would be, to enjoy a little netspeak, dA2dA...or something like that…

Posted by George James Malik from South Lyon, MI on 02/28/08 at 08:21 AM ET

That’s good.  Or we could just use the tried-and-true FUBAR.

Posted by Baroque from Michigan on 02/28/08 at 08:35 AM ET

For the injury thing, whenever I see a Redwing get hit by the puck, limps off the ice, is laying on the ice for any amount of time or just when I hear of an injury to a Redwing, about the only thing I can verbalize for the next ten minutes is, “Well kiss my ass Gary!” Maybe that’s just me, but that’s how I roll!

FWIW IMHO:

“Because, Motherf***ers, that’s how I roll.”

...is the best thing since, well, beer.  I know, it doesn’t take much to humor me.

Posted by cementslinger from Midland MI on 02/28/08 at 08:38 AM ET

Injury Reports from the Wings are patently misleading and overly optimistic, which in turn gives rise to the false hope that said player may actually return to the ice much sooner than they usally do.

They are not credible, and ought to always be read as just plain B.S.  Given the fact that most injury reports are ridiculously inaccurate, we should develope an adage or acronym for the Organization passing off this B.S.:

WTFK (Who the F@#k Knows)

Wobbly

Perhaps we borrow from last years playoffs, and use “StillWuzzi”

How about we “borrow” from the NFL, and describe all injuries listed by the Organization as:
“Questionable” not that the injury is questionable, but what the Organization is spouting off regarding the seriousness of the injury and the duration of recovery certainly is!!

I know my suggestions are pretty damn lame, but Chief gave us till Sat., so I’ll keep rubbing my synapses together.

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Hockey Netherworld on 02/28/08 at 11:22 AM ET

Stress train, it must be on there.  It is part of my lexicon at my house.  While watching the Edmonton game, “I’m driving the stress train.” Seeing Pisani on the ice with Lilja in the box, “Stress train full speed ahead!” I have nothing remotely funny or intelligent to add…

Posted by hockeychic from Denver, CO on 02/28/08 at 11:31 AM ET

List EVERYBODY as “Questionable with general body soreness.”

Posted by Baroque from Michigan on 02/28/08 at 11:38 AM ET

“Canadiacs” should be added to everyone’s lexicon, as the average Canadian hockey fan is the most arrogant, ignorant, annoying pile of trash in sports.

Can someone get Thomas a tissue?

Posted by dash_pinched on 02/28/08 at 11:46 AM ET

The Shafted Highlander and “dA2dA” are both brilliant, especially since the first references a gawd-awful tv show (which I used to watch all the time). I’m not sure if George intended it but “dA2dA” sounds and looks like DADA, the avant-garde aesthetic movement in Europe after WWI.

Also, I love “strained motivator cuff.” I’m using that from now on. Thanks Sweetie

Posted by Osrt on 02/28/08 at 12:43 PM ET

The TV show wasn’t THAT bad - cheesy and contrived, yes, but the costuming was nice.

Also, I love “strained motivator cuff.” I’m using that from now on.Thanks Sweetie

You’re welcome.

(sigh)

Posted by Baroque from Michigan on 02/28/08 at 01:10 PM ET

I’m sorry, Baroque!  Look, to make it up to you I’ll help you get back to your feared status if you like, or I’ll teach you veiled insults in Latin, Spanish, and Hebrew.  Or I can find out some more obscure regional terms of endearment for you to throw back at them.  Your choice.

(Nuts.  I was only trying to express genuine concern, and look what’s started).

Also, I love “strained motivator cuff.”

There’s an expression they use here for that: “Man-Flu.” I’m not sure if it’s worth putting in the lexicon, though.

The first thing that comes to mind when I hear MacLeod is my aunt in Harper Woods, who married a man named MacLeod and took his name.  So Shafted Highlander doesn’t work for me, especially because each time I hear it I think of caber tossing.  Since he should fly, but doesn’t, while the Diggers, who should spend their time on the ground, do-- and nothing escapes his observation-- how about The Grounded Gazer?

Okay, dumb.  I’ll stop now.

Posted by AndrewFromAnnArbor from a truck full of contrition on 02/28/08 at 01:30 PM ET

On second thought, that just sounds like showing off.  So how about I offer you a heartfelt apology, a promise to never do it again, and say that the check is in the mail?

Posted by AndrewFromAnnArbor from the accounting department, paying for my mistakes on 02/28/08 at 02:28 PM ET

Geez, Andrew - There’s no need to apologize for being nice, dammit.

If it mollifies you at all, I grew up with two younger brothers and two younger sisters, and I think our family’s second language was English because the first language was smartass sarcasm.

If you don’t stop acting pathetically sorry I’ll hunt you down and smack you! 

Posted by Baroque from Michigan on 02/28/08 at 02:49 PM ET

Geez, Andrew - There’s no need to apologize for being nice, dammit.

Well, I’d say sorry here, but that would kind of defeat the point, wouldn’t it?

I grew up with two younger brothers and two younger sisters

You have my sympathies.  I have two older and one younger sisters.  My family’s first language was one of simmering resentment and subtle undermining of confidence.  Might have been Swahili for all I understood it.  Grew up with, well, best way to say it is different people really, and I find humans in general to be a strange lot and real tough to read.  I cannot pick up on sarcasm in real life (seriously-- I kid you not), so have no chance online.  Doesn’t stop me from trying, though.

If you don’t stop acting pathetically sorry I’ll hunt you down and smack you!

Promise? 

All right, lesson learned.  I’ll continue to be myself and the rest of you can work around it to accommodate me.  All about the compromising, I am.

Once all the defensemen are healthy again, if, despite the stunning play of Meech and the presence of a physical puckmover in Stuart, Lilja makes it back into the top four, we give him an entry under Dr. Faustus (or Der Freischutz, or Wilhelm-- if Buzz Fledderjohn is reading this, he’ll know what I mean).  Because only a pact with the Devil would explain why he were there.

Boy, I’m in a classical Gothic mood today…

Posted by AndrewFromAnnArbor on 02/29/08 at 03:51 AM ET

Please, somebody make the joke about a trade with the New York Islanders.

Posted by AndrewFromAnnArbor from wondering if the NYIs #81 plays the fiddle... on 02/29/08 at 04:19 AM ET

You have my sympathies.

No sympathies necessary.  Like most kids we fought like rapid psychotic jackals when we were young, but now that we are grown and no longer sharing the same roof we get along great and are pretty close.  It would have been horrible to be an only child - how do you escape blame for breaking something when you were playing frisbee in the living room if you don’t have siblings?  It’s one of my uncles and his ex that are the “Jerry Springer wing” of my family.

I cannot pick up on sarcasm in real life (seriously-- I kid you not), so have no chance online. 

Then what the heck are you doing here?  A2Y is Hockey Sarcasm Central!

I think Holland missed an opportunity for a trade.  He could have traded Lilja to Montreal for Patrice Brisbois.  Sure, he isn’t very good, and the Canadiens fans cringe every time he manages to escape from the closet they have him locked in, but at least he is hurt a lot so he can’t commit turnovers and hurt the team too much!  That’s better, right?

(And don’t worry, I can’t hunt you down - my passport expired several years ago, and despite the fact that one of my coworkers is apparently intimidated by my presence, which makes me chuckle, I’m not that scary.  Besides, if I ever turn into such an air-headed bimbo with the intellectual depth of a parking lot puddle that being called “sweetie” is such an offense to my delicate sensibilities that I get all upset, I hope someone has the compassion to just shoot me and put me out of misery before I waste any more oxygen that could be put to better use.)

Posted by Baroque from Michigan on 02/29/08 at 06:15 AM ET

Then what the heck are you doing here?  A2Y is Hockey Sarcasm Central!

That’ll be mostly the Chief’s writing that keeps me here.  A good community of commentators helps.  Seriously though, I’m pretty naive when it comes to sarcasm.  It’s a gift.

He could have traded Lilja to Montreal for Patrice Brisbois.

A plan deveilishly clever in its intricacies!  Of course, if that’s the aim, one of us could go whack Lilja’s legs with a bat next time he’s lurking outside The Deja Vu.  Gawd, lookit me-- reduced to plotting cheap felonies in the public atmosphere of the WWW because of the frustratingly inconsistent play of a defenseman.  I really need a hobby.

my passport expired several years ago

Better get it renewed if you want to got to Canadaland for anything-- as I understand it, it’ll be mandatory shortly.  At least that’ll have one upside-- snooty Europeans won’t be able to titter haughtily at the statistic of only 10% of Americans being passport holders.

I’m not that scary

I don’t know about that-- you may not normally be terrifying, but my family has the propensity to make people insanely angry.  Without trying to amuse people with what is in essence a pretty horrible story, you know the USPS worker in Royal Oak who originally coined the term “to go postal?” His boss?  My cousin.

Quite a nice rant though.  Point taken about the little things not worrying you.  It must be nice to be not neurotic.  I dream about it sometimes, but it’s only when I’m drunk that I come close.  In any case, like I said, point taken, I’ll be more easygoing on here and just do what I do.  Because, motherf***ers, that’s how I roll.

Posted by AndrewFromAnnArbor from a place where I have too much spare time - work on 02/29/08 at 08:59 AM ET

“Miss Canada”

Definition: vying for the attention of the officials.

As it pertains to hockey: diving or exaggerating the effects of a hook, hold or high-stick.

Use: “That Paul Kariya is a real Miss Canada.”

(Sorry, I exceeded the pixel width by a little there).

Posted by Subic Bay Ray on 03/01/08 at 08:48 AM ET

I’m gonna go ahead and guess that between that photo and the nickname, you’re out to get the Chief’s attention for your entry.  And you’ll succeed, no doubt.  With a pic like that, how could you not?

That being said, Miss Canada appears to be an even-toed ungulate of the Arabian variety-- the kind that store fat in their hump (this is just waiting for a joke).  Meaning she appears to have a bit of pelvic podiatry going.  Quite prevalent these days.

Anyway, if Miss Canada makes it in, we have to have a flip-side: Danielle House.  A former Miss Canada who got into a spot of trouble when she beat up the girlfriend of an ex-boyfriend in a bar, and later posed for Playboy wearing nothing but boxing gloves and a tiara.  A pugnacious spokeswoman for the Canadian fur industry, she’d be the ideal representative of scrappy hockey players who fight like proverbial girls.  See Jesse Boulerice, Jordin Tootoo, and Scotty Parker.

Posted by AndrewFromAnnArbor from my walk-in closet, next to stacks of magazines on 03/02/08 at 08:58 AM ET

I hadn’t seen the photo until this morning, Andrew.  But I’m convinced Miss Canada has all the qualities for inclusion in the glossary. Subic Bay Ray is an intelligent man.  Danielle House is worthy also.

Glossary update: I’ll be working on it off and on throughout the day, hopefully unveiling it at game time tonite.

Posted by IwoCPO from Washington, DC on 03/02/08 at 09:03 AM ET