Posted by Aaron from Phoenix on 06/08/09 at 08:59 PM ET

All that’s missing is a “douche canoe” sign.

Posted by Alan from Atlanta on 06/08/09 at 08:36 PM ET

And I seriously can’t get enough of that Happy photoshop.  Every time I look at it I laugh out loud for at least 30 seconds.

I want t-shirts of that distributed to all of the free world.

Posted by jennyquarx on 06/08/09 at 08:39 PM ET

I want t-shirts of that distributed to all of the free world.
Posted by jennyquarx on 06/08/09 at 09:39 PM ET

Jennyquarx is running for President.  You heard it here first.

Posted by MarkK from Maryland on 06/08/09 at 08:42 PM ET

And I seriously can’t get enough of that Happy photoshop.  Every time I look at it I laugh out loud for at least 30 seconds.
I want t-shirts of that distributed to all of the free world.

And a framed copy for the living room wall

Posted by Bingo Bango Jessie on 06/08/09 at 08:43 PM ET

There.  I liked it so much I appropriated it as my avatar.

Posted by jennyquarx on 06/08/09 at 08:49 PM ET

I want that photo etched into a set of pint glasses.

Posted by Jennemy of the Skate from putting the b*tches in the box on 06/08/09 at 08:49 PM ET

@jennemy - As long as your rivalry stories also involve the magnificence of Leafs legend Wendel Clark, the real reason why Bob Probert decided to stay home and not come to Canada for a few years (hah!), I’ll be looking forward reminiscing about the old Norris Division/Western Conference battles.

Posted by bkblades on 06/08/09 at 08:49 PM ET

And I seriously can’t get enough of that Happy photoshop.  Every time I look at it I laugh out loud for at least 30 seconds.

There is something so demented about it - like a cautionary tale regarding cloning.

@ MarkK -

Yup, very close.  I usually just told people Hopkins because it was right across the street from the hospital, and required less explanation.  Heck, the buildings were connected by underground tunnels anyway.

The summers are insanely humid, so be prepared for a lot of stickiness and sweating.

And in the winters, the roads are kept quite clear - but the hot summer bakes all knowledge of winter out of the heads of the populace, so they COMPLETELY FORGET how to drive in an inch of snow and you may very well find yourself stuck behind an SUV on the beltway going about 20 mph because there is a half inch of snow on the road and the salt trucks haven’t gone by yet.  Also, do not go to the stores when it is snowing if you can possibly avoid it, because they will be full of people getting what I called the holy trinity of winter provisions - bread, milk, and toilet paper.  Seriously, you might stop in a convenience store for a cup of coffee, and everyone lined up at the register will have a gallon of milk, a loaf of bread, and a four-pack of toilet paper.  It’s like they are all members of some odd cult.  And this is if they are predicting an inch or two of snow - it isn’t even as though a foot and a half is expected, with dangerous wind chills and high winds.  Just snow.

At least it’s always good for a laugh from those more comfortable with real winter weather. 

Posted by Baroque from Michigan on 06/08/09 at 08:50 PM ET

@bkblades Yeah, most of my fond memories of the old Norris division involve the Bruise Brothers.  lol.

Posted by Jennemy of the Skate from putting the b*tches in the box on 06/08/09 at 09:07 PM ET

There’s something awkwardly hilarious about these Scott Burnside videos.

And Pierre LeBrun says Pav looked “terrific” (with heavy emphasis) in practice.

Posted by Triple Deke Tyler from Lansing on 06/08/09 at 09:08 PM ET

I assume it’s safe to come back for the time being?

All hail glarkware (and Television Without Pity): Swedish Mafia and Khan!

I want that Swedish mafia shirt with a number 5 on the back.

Posted by Aphaea from Pennsylvania on 06/08/09 at 09:11 PM ET

I want that Swedish mafia shirt with a number 5 on the back.

Iron it on!  That shirt is awesome.

Posted by jennyquarx on 06/08/09 at 09:19 PM ET

@Tyler - I couldn’t get the photos to work but the article was actually pretty funny.

@Aphaea - I think so. I’m pretending it is anyway.

Posted by Jennemy of the Skate from putting the b*tches in the box on 06/08/09 at 09:22 PM ET

Ok, that Swedish Mafia shirt rocks, thanks for posting Aphaea.

Posted by Jennemy of the Skate from putting the b*tches in the box on 06/08/09 at 09:24 PM ET

@%# *^#@ I’m tired of this.  I come here for RedWing hockey, plain and simple.  Sure fans of any other team hate us - big whoop, of course they do.  Just STFU and smile.  It’ll drive ‘em batshit crazy - much like the Wings do to those fans’ respective teams when the Wings refuse to be ‘physical’ after the whistle.  If the Wings didn’t have more Stanley Cups than fingers opposing fans wouldn’t give a rat’s arse about any of us or the Red Wings.  And don’t let anybody fool ya, you bet your arse they hate the Red Wings more than Red Wing fans.  If those damn Red Wings would just lose a well-placed game here or there, we wouldn’t be bothering them at all.

I’ve lurked around these parts of The Gore since 2 domains before A2Y was at The Empire.  I don’t say much because I’m not witty like the rest of The 19 and can’t seem to figure out how in the world the rest of The 19 can: * watch a game * make comments * refresh * read comments * respond to comments etc etc etc * all while I’m frozen in contorted positions leaning one way or the other trying in vain to will pucks either away from our net or into theirs during LBs.  But I love to come here and read what The 19 have to say.  Usually.  But for shit’s sake, I’m just into the hockey and SCP run and I’m sick to death of wading through the faceless internet bravado.  Yeah, I know, nobody’s holding a gun to my head so why don’t I just bugger off, eh?

Chief runs this ship and he’s into it - invites it even - so I’m not asking or expecting things to change.  I’m just saying, that as a Red Wings fan who’s excited as all hell about the Red Wings and the playoffs, I grow weary of the pissing matches.

Wyshynski seems pretty level-headed frankly.  He’s given the Wings a pretty fair shake of late, but I do ignore the comments there and EVERYwhere (MGoBlog included) but here for all the same reasons I’m whining about right now.  I imagine that if I was blogging and had to cover the dive or the anaheimlich maneuvers in a SCF I’d be mentally incapable of doing so w/o my pure hate bleeding out all over the place or my grey matter splattering the monitor.  Wysh is fine in my book.  Screw the rest of the petulant masses whose self-esteem issues force them to blow hard on the internet to achieve a skewed sense of fulfillment.  Let them blow hard into the ether ... unnoticed.

As good as The 19 are, the Detroit Red Wings are the best weiner repellent goin’.

Before I vacate my soapbox ... And please, this is nothing personal against the creative one of The 19 who came up with this.  While I love The Band of Bitches moniker, well, I have to say I just can’t help but feel pangs of sacreligion and blasphemy.  I’ll admit that I have no iron-clad argument here, but suffice it to say that my life has exactly zero parallels with any of the WWII vets, or the sacrifices that generation made as a whole for me.  And by no means does being a Wing fan give me the desire to impinge upon their legacy with something so trivial.  Their last full measure of devotion and their awe-inspiring accomplishments are both sacred to me.  Call me oversensitive, but I had to get that off my chest.

Buggering off in 3, 2, 1 ...

Go Wings!

Posted by Hoser from Downer Peninsula, Michigan on 06/08/09 at 09:25 PM ET

Also, do not go to the stores when it is snowing if you can possibly avoid it, because they will be full of people getting what I called the holy trinity of winter provisions - bread, milk, and toilet paper.  Seriously, you might stop in a convenience store for a cup of coffee, and everyone lined up at the register will have a gallon of milk, a loaf of bread, and a four-pack of toilet paper.  It’s like they are all members of some odd cult.  And this is if they are predicting an inch or two of snow - it isn’t even as though a foot and a half is expected, with dangerous wind chills and high winds.  Just snow.

At least it’s always good for a laugh from those more comfortable with real winter weather. 

Posted by Baroque from Michigan on 06/08/09 at 09:50 PM ET
Sounds like here in Greenville. We just need a threat of snow or freezing rain. and the milk, bread, and tp fly off the shelves. Unless your’e on the redneck side of town, in which case it’s beer and cigarettes.

Posted by cigar_nurse from Greenville South Cakalakee on 06/08/09 at 09:32 PM ET

We just need a threat of snow or freezing rain. and the milk, bread, and tp fly off the shelves. Unless your’e on the redneck side of town, in which case it’s beer and cigarettes. 
Posted by cigar_nurse from Greenville South Cakalakee on 06/08/09 at 10:32 PM ET

Priorities, priorities.

Posted by calquake on 06/08/09 at 09:34 PM ET

Holy *#$%@& Shit people.  This is redunkulos.  I am calling bullshit on quite a few comments going on in here.  Its starting to read like Puckdaddy comments.  Half the fun of coming on this site was having good conversation with the 19.  I gave up today after page 4 of comments.  And all I wanted to do was post this http://sf.carnalnation.com/content/6294/4/bacon-flavored-lube-what-every-sex-pig-needs-sizzling-good-time-sfw    Bacon Flavored Lube.  Now I dont know if we deserve this.  I just dont know anymore.

Posted by AxeMaster9 on 06/08/09 at 10:23 PM ET

What. The. Fu**?

The Stanley Cup could be awarded in less than 24 hours.

To our Red Wings. 

Jesus you guys. 

Joe’s irritated with me because of some stuff I deleted two years ago.  He can deny it, but that’s the deal. 

His remarks aren’t directed at you. They’re coming right at me because Joe likes to test me and push my buttons from time to time…all because of San Jose 2007.

Cal, Matt, TDub…can anyone really question their juveniliciousness?  No.  Well, Matt’s a smart bastard but he lets his “kid” out from time to time.

And his blog is class.

As far as this place losing its edge?  I would bet that if you compared my first year in blogging to this, you’d see that this season has seen a lot more “edginess”.

I’ll tell you guys something about the Vladdie thing at PensBlog.  Those guys made a mistake and I’m talking about Adam and Derek (Bunny and Blanche).  If they had to do it over again, I’d bet they wouldn’t have posted that picture.  It was their readers, and I’m talking some serious scum, who took it and ran with it.

I honestly believe the cancer remarks were made here to elicit a reaction.  Obviously that worked.  I find them despicable because nothing scares me more than that disease and I know millions have been affected.  Obvious stuff right there.

Hoser, I hear ya on the Band of Bitches thing.  But I think that the way it was started, it really goes back to a high level of respect for those guys.  The conversation that led to the creation of that nickname was very respectful.

I blame this 320 comment conversation from hell directly on Gary.Ass.  Too many days in between.  Boredom and anxiety, when mixed together, can only lead to bad things.

Sleep it off bitches.  We got a motherfu**ing Cup to win tomorrow.

Posted by IwoCPO from Sunny San Diego, bitches on 06/08/09 at 10:32 PM ET

They would fill the Red Barn to the rafters, obnoxious as hell.  Fair weather fans that only root for the current winning team. Normal to me was 4-5,000 and many from Windsor.  They knew their hockey, and behaved properly.  It just was irritating as hell to have Olympia fill up with thee scum that were excited by these team they were never allowed to watch (no cable back then).

I was 14 when JLA opened…....still remember going to games at the Barn with my Dad.  ‘73 to ‘90 were some pretty lean years for the Wings that’s fo sho.

Posted by Wings_Fan_In_KC from ...somewhere southwest of The Motor City... on 06/08/09 at 10:33 PM ET

16 for 16!!

Posted by Wings_Fan_In_KC from ...somewhere southwest of The Motor City... on 06/08/09 at 10:36 PM ET

Sleep tight, Bitches.

Looking forward to this scene tomorrow… plus a shiny cup hoisted by # 81.

(yeah, it’s old… bite me.)

Posted by TeamDub from The gratch. on 06/08/09 at 10:53 PM ET

(yeah, it’s old… bite me.)

Still makes me smile….does that make me completely demented….oh well

Posted by Bingo Bango Jessie on 06/08/09 at 10:57 PM ET

Erm, that’s BackROOM Dave, but I know what you’re talking about.

Really you paid $1?  Maybe that’s why I gots mine for free..

wait that didn’t sound good…

Posted by Hippy Dave from Portland by way of Detroit on 06/08/09 at 11:02 PM ET

To be fair, his point on the TFP show today was that this, on top of other things this year (Hossa’s disallowed goal, the back-to-back start of the SCF, etc), made it easy to see why Wings fans have an ‘us v them’ mentality.

What I got from talking to him today is that he feels none of these issues on their own warrant an ‘us v them’, but added together, well.

That was really cool Red Winger, to see some of the 19 out and active in the hockey media world.  There really are some cool folks here.

Posted by Hippy Dave from Portland by way of Detroit on 06/08/09 at 11:03 PM ET

Still makes me smile….does that make me completely demented….oh well

Posted by Bingo Bango Jessie on 06/08/09 at 11:57 PM ET

You’re probably demented for other reasons.  Nothing wrong with that at all. 

Was there a full moon out tonight, or something?  I couldn’t see the moon because I was looking for a tornado (no such luck, fortunately - although if I was really lucky, maybe one would take out my garage and then I wouldn’t have to paint it).

Depending on how many overtimes in game six (I know, I know - I’ll shut it!), the Stanley Cup could be awarded in less than 24 hours.  Is it too early for me to start getting nauseous?  Because I think I am already.  Game sevens are scary.

*****

And I hope you had a pleasant flight, Chief.  At least you arrived in one piece, and that is always a good sign.

Posted by Baroque from Michigan on 06/08/09 at 11:33 PM ET

I think the lesson here, Chief, is that you can’t leave us alone like that.  My God, look what happens when you do.

1 to 12, bitches.  1.  To.  12.

Posted by Incognetis from Delaware... Hi... I'm in... Delaware on 06/08/09 at 11:48 PM ET

I think the lesson here, Chief, is that you can’t leave us alone like that.  My God, look what happens when you do.

Inmates.  Asylum.  Running with scissors and other dangerous objects.

(At least he knows I can be trusted - I won’t babysit anyone else, though.) 

Posted by Baroque from Michigan on 06/09/09 at 12:21 AM ET

Really you paid $1?  Maybe that’s why I gots mine for free..

Bastard!  How?

I don’t donate blood because needles terrify me.

And a good thing too then Baroque—because they can’t have you hooked up to the bag forever (it actually only takes about ten minutes to donate a pint of blood), they use 8-gauge needles.  First time I saw one it looked like the friggin’ Windsor Tunnel, I swear.  And they rub the site (generally the inside of the elbow) with iodine, so it stings.  That’s not to mention the finger prick you get immediately prior so that they can check your iron levels (did you know healthy blood sinks in water?  I didn’t until then).  But if you’re freaked out about needles, I won’t even go into what donating bone marrow entails…

In the same vein (geddit?!?)—thanks for the link Aphaea, I’m going to see if there’s some way I can wangle the Red Cross into taking my blood again.  Oh, and me likey Glarkware—glad to see it’s back.  I have their “Ask Me About My Crippling Shyness” shirt among others.

My summer plans…not much.  Seeing friends, drinking beer, working in the garden, avoiding the heat, buying a new lens and taking photos.  Might go visit friends in various places on a few weekends.  My older sister is coming over for a visit at the end of July; we’re taking her to Ireland to stay with the in-laws and see the place.  A large part of it will be spent breathlessly anticipating the beginning of October and seeing the Wings live for the first time in a few years and meeting a few of the 19.

The years that I blogged,

Gramps, can I just say that while it wasn’t a daily read, I miss HockeytownTodd?  Especially the apropos Dylan clips, not to mention the impressive insight into upcoming games.  What made you stop?

And I seriously can’t get enough of that Happy photoshop.  Every time I look at it I laugh out loud for at least 30 seconds.

It’s now my wallpaper and disturbed my wife deeply.  She thought it was just a photo of the Wings laughing.  I said, “Look closely.”  She did, then she shuddered.  The Oompa Loompa one, I don’t know who originally put it together, but it’s an old one.

And not to throw a grenade in, but I remember the San Jose ‘controversy.’  I didn’t think there was anything that bad about it, but…whatever.

Back to rocking gently in the corner and mewing piteously…

Posted by AndrewFromAnnArbor from Fortress Europe on 06/09/09 at 02:04 AM ET

His remarks aren’t directed at you. They’re coming right at me because Joe likes to test me and push my buttons from time to time…all because of San Jose 2007.

Oh, really? 

And what about my comments/photoshops regarding Ken Hitchcock’s weight?  The ones that also garnered whines from some of the touchy-feely do-gooders here.  Were those, too, just another example in your mind of me pushing your buttons?  I wouldn’t think so, seeing as how you embedded my first ‘Hitch-shop’ into one of your blog entries for that series.
 
You know, Hitchcock isn’t fat by choice.  He has a medical condition.  It’s not his fault.  It could very well cost him his life one day—soon, even—due to higher susceptibility to heart disease, stroke, chronic high blood pressure and a host of other serious ailments.  Potentially dying from obesity-related illness is no different than potentially dying from re-activated Hodgkin’s.  You’re still just as dead.  So, PC-wise, making fun of someone in Hitch’s condition probably isn’t something you should be encouraging. 

And yet you did.

So, once again, just like during the Sharks series of 07, after encouraging it, after participating in it even, you decide on the spur of the moment to move the goal posts right in the middle of the kick.  Man, you make it tough for a simpleton like me to get a read on what is and what is not acceptable to you at any given time.  Are you non-PC only on odd-number days?  Even-numbered days? Where exactly is the line-not-to-be-crossed with you today (June 09 – an odd number day)?

Never mind.  No need to answer.  I give up…again.

Posted by O-Joe on 06/09/09 at 03:34 AM ET

So, once again, just like during the Sharks series of 07, after encouraging it, after participating in it even, you decide on the spur of the moment to move the goal posts right in the middle of the kick.

Oh. I"ve encouraged making light of cancer?  I’ll have to do some serious introspection there Joe. As I’ve said, this isn’t about any of you.  It’s all about Joe and his prolonged irritation that we dared to delete a few of his comments two years ago.  Oh. The shame.

I give up…again.

And there goes Joe.  Again.

Posted by IwoCPO from Sunny San Diego, bitches on 06/09/09 at 03:47 AM ET

I’m going to see if there’s some way I can wangle the Red Cross into taking my blood again

Aw poo—still nothing.  I knew it was a number of years overseas, thought it was three, turns out it’s five.  Whatever, I’m still ineligible to donate blood to the American Red Cross.  I guess I’ll give the National Blood Service a call and see if I can wheedle them into partially exsanguinating me…

Posted by AndrewFromAnnArbor from Fortress Europe on 06/09/09 at 03:48 AM ET

I am really hoping that “Game 6 nerves” is a reasonable excuse for pouring a big slug of Kahlua in my morning coffee at 5 AM.

Posted by dougie on 06/09/09 at 04:20 AM ET

Whoa, it just hit me…

Chief making fun of the morbidly obese (Hitchcock) = OK
Pensblog making fun of wheelchair-bound individuals (Vladdie) = Bad.

Got it.

Posted by O-Joe on 06/09/09 at 04:34 AM ET

O-Joe, please, for everyone’s sake, be the bigger man here.  You don’t always have to have the last word.  Leave the parting shot be and just let it go.

Posted by AndrewFromAnnArbor from Fortress Europe on 06/09/09 at 05:07 AM ET

Cal, Matt, TDub…can anyone really question their juveniliciousness?  No.  Well, Matt’s a smart bastard but he lets his “kid” out from time to time.

Hey Cal - I’m making paste smoothies over here in the corner if you’d like one.

Posted by TeamDub from The gratch. on 06/09/09 at 05:56 AM ET

Sounds nice Dub, but I’ll pass…unless you have any Crayon-sicles?

Besides, it looks like your avatar has already had more than his fill of paste, and probably more than a few paint chips.

Posted by AndrewFromAnnArbor from Fortress Europe on 06/09/09 at 06:05 AM ET

Andrew -

Sorry, no Crayon-sicles but I am attempting to make chalk-cakes in my Creepy Crawler oven.

I’ll update as warranted.

Posted by TeamDub from The gratch. on 06/09/09 at 06:08 AM ET

I like Wysh.  If you’re passionate about hockey, you’re passionate about a specific team, but I don’t think his detracts from a well-rounded and, often, poignant commentary.

I do, however, think that Two Line Pass is probably the lowliest hockey blogger out there—an ignorant, bullheaded, mean guy whose only traction in the blogworld is by stating something unfounded and idiotic to anger readers.  And for that presence on his blog, Wysh IS to be blamed.  I don’t know if TLP is a childhood friend given a charity job, or a faux-shock factor, but it really pulls down an otherwise great collection of writers at Puck-Daddy.

Posted by MP from NYC on 06/09/09 at 10:57 AM ET