Abel to Yzerman
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What?...Us Worry?
by IwoCPO on 04/05/07 at 07:24 PM ET
Comments (3)
Hell no we’re not. Because it’s not in our genes. We’re not bred that way, you and me. When back specialists fly in to treat our young future Captain, we go all fetal. When our brittle, chicken-wired groin of a wack job three-time savior is held out for the last two games against a team that hates us (yeah, narrow that number down right?), we give strict orders to the family not to speak until all is confirmed as well.
So, what should we worry about, and what should we look at as pure caution on the parts of Those Who Need To Win More Than Most (Uncles Ken and Mike)?
Hasek: he’s out tonite and most likely Saturday. Why? No one really knows. Oh, well, Babcock does. But it’s April and he’s got jokes.
Babcock at first laughed and joked (presumably) Hasek was out because, “he’s got a huge groin pull and might not play again” - a reference to the fact Hasek hasn’t finished his previous two NHL seasons because of groin injuries.
Yeah. Real funny motherfu…
...anyway, he’s probably fine.
Bertuzzi: healthy and ready to impale anything remotely Provincial.
Lidstrom: less than healthy, but most likely resting out of a sense of paranoia not seen since The Stallion discovered Mick had been carrying him in Rocky III (minute 22).
Nah, it’s not in our nature. We’re a calm group of fans, by nature. Things like the Summer of Ken, the Decision, Punches in the Face, suicidal goalies, goalie controversies, insane goalies and goalies in general have no effect on us.
So with two games left in the most meaningless regular season in the history of meaningless regular seasons, we’re taking this rash of injuries in stride. Aren’t we?
Zetterberg: saw a comment over on MLive a few minutes ago that has a little merit. Essentially this: why would Chelios make the comment about the back specialist less than a week before the playoffs if Zetterberg wasn’t coming back fairly soon? Answer: Because Chris Chelios is Chris Chelios. He doesn’t exactly speak without thinking, like a certain former Wing so desperate for more national air time that he’d spew something controversial just to be controversial, but definitely not one to hold back.
Here’s the thing with Zetterberg. This could very well be legend time. This could be shades of hyperbaric (hyperbolic, hyperkinetic, hyperyzermaniac) chambers. And playing through pain, through four rounds, with gritted teeth and closeups and slo-mo…that’s legendary stuff.
Mike Babcock, in his MBCQOTD (thanks Hoser), agrees.
Billy Blanks was kicking my butt last night Ansar. Kicking….my….butt. I had those straps wrapped around my neck, my ankle and the leg of the table and I was feeling it. Ansar…ANSAR…I’m not done. Good. Stay with me. I was feeling it and I started thinking that if I could handle the pain of pillatatizing myself every three days then by god we can get Hank on the ice. So, we brought in a doc…paid him a few Joe Bucks, a medium pie and a stack of chips. I think he’s gonna see things our way.
So, yeah, we’re stressing. We’re stressing about the injuries. We’re stressing about the Flames. We’re stressing about losing Game 1 to a team that isn’t supposed to be able to win on the road. We’re stressing about the pain that follows every loss and the man-hours of work lost due to the stupidity of the Wings presence in the Western Conference.
Ugh. Less than a week and the real torture begins.
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Comments
I didn’t know they had a What Would Jimmy D. Do bracelet!
Posted by Paul from Motown Area on 04/06/07 at 08:32 AM ET
Gah, until I see Hank on the ice, color me very worried. Sigh. Another shootout, another loss.
Posted by hockeychic on 04/06/07 at 10:08 AM ET
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Worry, stress, general overall grumpiness, hair-triggered temper spring-loaded to lash out at anyone and everyone for the barest of perceived slights or provocations.
I hate this time of year.
Time to go to my sock drawer and dig out my WTFWJD bracelet and wear that around for awhile. That usually calms me down, somewhat.
Posted by O-Joe on 04/06/07 at 08:23 AM ET