Mike Chen's Hockey Blog

Entries with the tag: New+Jersey+Devils

[Gretzky] You!

by Mike Chen on 04/15/09 at 11:09 PM ET
Comments (0)

You loved him as Silent Bob and now laugh with Kevin Smith and his obsession with the New Jersey Devils thanks to the return of the NHL Celebrity Blogs. While some of those blogs are just random thoughts from casual fans who happened to be in a few cable movies, Kevin Smith knows—and loves—his hockey. The only reason for me root for the Devils is for him to keep writing these things. Check out his “compromise” for cursing in his posts:

Naturally, the good folks at NHL.com would prefer I keep my ramblings “tv safe”.  I said, “Look, I want everyone to be able to enjoy my stuff – not just transvestite hookers.”  After that confusion was cleared up, I made my impassioned plea for what I call “the option to include frank asides and thesis-strengthening expressions that might be considered off-color by some.”  They saw through that approach, too.

So, with thanks to my friend Marc Bernardin, and with the help of hockey legend and all-around super nice guy Wayne Gretzky (a fella who never cursed on the ice; never), I present you with our compromise: anytime I work myself up into a lather about the Devs, so much so that I lose my head and include potentially offensive terminology?  I will then swap said terminology for the kindler, gentler, more family-friendly and NHL-approved term “Gretzky” (or a derivative/conjugation of Mr. Gretzky’s names) instead.

...

I know what you’re thinking: “Listen to this fat [Gretzky] braggin’ about all the money he’s got!  Big man, with the pregnant-lady gut and the [Gretzin’] arm flab!  Hey, Fatty – you’re gonna die alone, you morbidly obese [Great One]!”

That almost makes me want to watch that copy of Clerks 2 I got as a gift.

Filed in: | Mike Chen's Hockey Blog | Permalink
 Tags: Kevin+Smith, New+Jersey+Devils,